How to get to know a polish guy better?

Quoting: ewa

Polish girl. I think you shouldn't hit on him directly. I agree, that man loves when woman is forward and sometimes it can make them "fire", but only for short period (even girl is beautiful).
My advice is to look at him in a special way, with admiration. Say him very innocent compliment. You can also suggest a meeting, but neutral. Don't say that you like him! Show it a little, but don't say

liii	May 15, 07, 12:49 / #
I met a polish guy in my evening courses . He lives in my neighbourhoud and he walked with me back home (not to where I live but to where our ways split) for 3 or 4 times. We have nice talks (for 10 minutes) I've live in Pl for few months so its our favorit subject. The courses are finished now but I do want to know him better! I have his e-mail address an he answer my mail, but never very personal. I don't know where he lives or have no phone number. I might see him next week (exam) but i hope this wont be the last time. I'm too shy and afraid to ask him out, and I do hoped he would ask me...but not... What should I do?

GoonieThreads: 10 Posts: 297 Joined: Mar 6, 07	Edited by: Goonie May 15, 07, 12:51 / #
ask him out, what's the worst that can happen... guys appreciate it and admire confident women!

liii	May 15, 07, 12:53 / #
I think in my mails it is quite clear i want that (but i never asked direct, difficult to ask in a mail right?)...

GoonieThreads: 10 Posts: 297 Joined: Mar 6, 07	May 15, 07, 17:20 / #
be blunt :) want me to call him for ya ;)

shewolfThreads: 5 Posts: 1,833 Joined: Dec 23, 06	May 15, 07, 18:00 / #
lol. If you want, I can call him and pretend I'm you and get a date for you. :) Seriously, men don't pick up on hints. If you feel too shy to ask him out face to face, ask him out in an email. It might seem like he knows what you want but he probably doesn't. You have to spell it out.

sledzThreads: 29 Posts: 3,202 Joined: Sep 19, 06	May 15, 07, 18:19 / #
Quoting: shewolf Seriously, men don't pick up on hints huh????? lol I have to agree with Goonie guys like it when a woman hits on them. liii, I`d say go for it, and if he doesnt respond then at least you will know how he feels..... then you can move on to a guy that appreciates a confident woman....like me:)

shewolfThreads: 5 Posts: 1,833 Joined: Dec 23, 06	May 15, 07, 18:27 / #
Quoting: sledz huh????? lol It's true. Men don't always pick up on hints. A woman has to be forward, don't you think?

sledzThreads: 29 Posts: 3,202 Joined: Sep 19, 06	May 15, 07, 18:45 / #
Quoting: shewolf It's true. Men don't always pick up on hints. A woman has to be forward, don't you think? Yes, most guys walk around with there heads in the clouds, I love it when a woman is forward, it fires me up!

liii	May 16, 07, 10:51 / #
Ok I did not ask him out yet.... but I knew he was leaving for Poland for a week or so, and asked him to bring some Polish food for me.. he said he will try to remember.. we 'll see when he comes back I kind of see it as a test (which may be not a good idea maybe..) o yes, another thing I remarked is that during our conversations he always asked a lot about me (work, holidays, weekends, friend,..) and I did not realy have a chance to ask a lot about him.... don't know if he 'avoids' this or is just too curious....

liii	May 21, 07, 13:59 / #
he got me some polish sweets... we talked and laughed a little, but i did not ask him to join for a drink in two days we will see us once again, last course, last chance?

southernThreads: 116 Posts: 10,947 Joined: May 17, 07	May 24, 07, 16:27 / #
Unzip his trousers.

liii	May 29, 07, 11:33 / #
Thank you Ewa... I think what I'm truying right now is more or less your approach... step by step... Now I just need some neutral invitation then !! :-) Anyway, as i only have his e-mail addres, no phone or adress i would not dare to right 'i like you' in a mail...

alan_ukThreads: - Posts: 7 Joined: May 30, 07	Jun 7, 07, 06:24 / #
Come on Liii, how are things progressing. we all hope wish you every success!

TengThreads: 1 Posts: 17 Joined: Jun 5, 07	Jun 7, 07, 07:14 / #
If I was you, will ask him to go out for a meal. Don't miss this chance, or else other girl will take it. Act now, which is more important. I can understand how do your feel. I do like a polish men, before but then i missed and can't see him but i will trying to visit poland one day one. Hope can meet him.

xXlisaXxThreads: 10 Posts: 233 Joined: Apr 11, 07	May 21, 07, 14:01 / #
Go for it girl wot have you got to lose. If you don't do anything your regret it for the rest of your life.

shewolfThreads: 5 Posts: 1,833 Joined: Dec 23, 06	May 21, 07, 14:08 / #
Quoting: liii he got me some polish sweets That's great! I think that's a good sign.

liii	May 24, 07, 16:22 / #
so... we went out for a drink :)- not just the two of us but with some other friends :( then we walked home again and said we would keep in touch by mail... pfff sigh so i don't know now if i want to be the first to mail (still kind of too shy anyway) and realy i do'nt know what he thinks about me, and I start to think and analyse way too much...!! (making list in my head of pro and contra...) i just want to know him a bit better... and then decide maybe to become more than friends (and even now i don't know IF i want to know him better... bit confusing i know) ..if i ask him out now, or maybe i'll scare him away or maybe he ...pff i don't know....

ewa	May 24, 07, 18:30 / #
Liii, I am Polish girl. I think you shouldn't hit on him directly. I agree, that man loves when woman is forward and sometimes it can make them "fire", but only for short period (even girl is beautiful). My advice is to look at him in a special way, with admiration. Say him very innocent compliment. You can also suggest a meeting, but neutral. Don't say that you like him! Show it a little, but don't say. But don t loss your chance. Polish guys are really really good. They can be very mannish but also careful and romantic and very often they are honest and belive in "one love":)

southernThreads: 116 Posts: 10,947 Joined: May 17, 07	May 24, 07, 18:41 / #
Quoting: ewa Polish girl. I think you shouldn't hit on him directly. I agree, that man loves when woman is forward and sometimes it can make them "fire", but only for short period (even girl is beautiful). My advice is to look at him in a special way, with admiration. Say him very innocent compliment. You can also suggest a meeting, but neutral. Don't say that you like him! Show it a little, but don't say Thank you,very enlightening.I have noticed these tendencies in polish girls,first time I see them so well written.

Ken NoddyThreads: 3 Posts: 193 Joined: Apr 30, 07	May 29, 07, 12:26 / #
Quoting: liii I'm too shy and afraid to ask him out, and I do hoped he would ask me...but not... Quoting: liii then we walked home again and said we would keep in touch by mail... Quoting: liii and realy i do'nt know what he thinks about me, and I start to think and analyse way too much...!! (making list in my head of pro and contra...) Been reading this thread with interest. I too am very shy and can certainly empathsise with your situation. Maybe all along he has been hoping you would make the first move. How about sending him an email and suggesting that you meet up somewhere, just for a chat. Its not a marriage proposal, nothing like that, just two people who are friends. Thats what friends do, isn't it? Trust your own judgment and take it slowly but I think it is best if you take control of this and make this first move. Believe me, I know it isn't easy but you will feel great that you have tried, even if it doesn't work out.

liiii	Jun 19, 07, 15:44 / #
Hi I'm back :) My progress? kind of none...I guess i did ask him out for a drink (by mail) and he said he was very busy with deadlines and so and that he would mail me the week after... did not hear him yet, so I mailed him again .... waiting waiting

liiii	Jun 20, 07, 15:54 / #
Yes yes, today we finaly went out for a drink he invited me but there were 5 of his collegues/friends at the table so we did not really talk a lot... :(( and now he is off to Poland for 3 weeks... :((( a positive thing is that he sent me his phonenumber by mail (its a local nbr so i don't know if he will read his sms or so in Poland) anyway, I don't even know what i should write to him... I still have the same feeling as in the beginning, I want to get to know this polish guy better... feels like i still don't know him enough Me

AmathystThreads: 30 Posts: 3,967 Joined: Nov 10, 06	Jun 20, 07, 16:12 / #
Quoting: liiii there were 5 of his collegues/friends at the table so we did not really talk a lot... Well, if he didnt think you were pretty he certainly wouldnt have invited you out in the company of work colleagues Quoting: liiii a positive thing is that he sent me his phonenumber by mail (its a local nbr so i don't know if he will read his sms or so in Poland) He probably wont use his phone in Poland, he'll more than likely have a Polish number, but you could send one text saying hope you have a nice holiday and see if he responds,

Ken NoddyThreads: 3 Posts: 193 Joined: Apr 30, 07	Jun 20, 07, 16:19 / #
I guess it's good that at least you got the chance to see him again, okay, it wasn't one to one but taking it slowly may be the best way forward. I don't know, I'm not really the one to give advice on these matters.

peterwegThreads: 35 Posts: 1,933 Joined: Feb 16, 07	Jun 20, 07, 16:46 / #
To be honest, if he was keen. he would have shown a lot more interest.

slwkkThreads: 3 Posts: 249 Joined: Mar 31, 07	Jun 20, 07, 16:48 / #
Quoting: peterweg To be honest, if he was keen. he would have shown a lot more interest. Yeah, I'm afraid peter is right...

AmathystThreads: 30 Posts: 3,967 Joined: Nov 10, 06	Jun 20, 07, 16:57 / #
Quoting: slwkk Quoting: peterweg To be honest, if he was keen. he would have shown a lot more interest. Yeah, I'm afraid peter is right... Arhh but would you give your phone number to a potential stalker? Maybe he's shy maybe he's gay (might have taken her along to meet work colleagues as a cover)...

Ken NoddyThreads: 3 Posts: 193 Joined: Apr 30, 07	Jun 21, 07, 05:36 / #
Quoting: Amathyst Maybe he's shy maybe he's gay (might have taken her along to meet work colleagues as a cover)... There are a million possible maybe's, but you should probably prepare yourself for the worst. It sounds like you have made it quite clear that you like him and he is either not getting the hint (we can be a bit dim in this respect) or more realistically (and painfully) he doesn't feel the same way about you. You really have to decide for yourself what to do next, you can continue taking it slowly, building up the friendship and hoping it leads to something more serious or grasp the bull by the horns and find out exactly where you stand. There isn't a right or wrong answer here, each to their own as they say. A thought has just occured to me and it would be interesting to hear others views; do people ever change their minds about someone romantically? By this I mean that initially they may not be interested, but then it suddenly dawns on them that this person is right for them. I had always believed in the 'love at first sight' theory until the other day when a girl I am friendly with, who, I admit, I never previously considered attractive suddenly appeared in a different light. Maybe it happens, but trying to force someone to like you when they just don't doesn't work either and it is a really tricky situation to guage. My heart goes out to you and I hope you can find a solution. Your own happiness is the key in all of this, please remember that.

ukinpolandThreads: 11 Posts: 444 Joined: Jan 16, 07	Edited by: ukinpoland Jun 21, 07, 06:21 / #
Maybe he has someone back in Poland? Could be an ex and he is not sure of his feelings for her/him(got to be PC correct).

moireThreads: 4 Posts: 49 Joined: Jan 13, 07	Jun 21, 07, 06:52 / #
men are realistic for relationship. I guess he does know you like him. but if you two cannt stay together in the near future, most men wouldnt like to have long distance relationship, unless they totally fall for somebody. from this point of view, he is a good guy who doent want to play with your feelings. maybe you should have a clear and serious talk with him, it is a torture for you to guess all the possiblities and wait for something never happens.