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Ultimatums - the death of a relationship



EcoprincessThreads: 1
Posts: 40
Joined: Aug 4, 08 		  Aug 12, 08, 11:39 /  #
Yesterday a platonic male friend gave me an ultimatum, to become more than platonic or never hear from him again. I told him that I did not respond to ultimatums.

Been a woman I then talked with my best female friend; while she was pouring a couple of glasses of wine, I explained the situation, we both took a sip from our glasses and looked at each other, without any doubt we both said "RUN".

Today I received from the same person another ultimatum "stop bolixing around and ring me", I think "RUN FASTER".

Why give others ultimatums?
BubbaWooThreads: 46
Posts: 4,438
Joined: Sep 26, 06 		  Aug 12, 08, 11:44 /  #
sometimes our own insecurities get the better of us

time to put your running shoes on

or be a good friend and say 'listen mate, lets talk this thru'

perhaps
EcoprincessThreads: 1
Posts: 40
Joined: Aug 4, 08 		  Aug 12, 08, 11:55 /  #
BubbaWoo:

or be a good friend and say 'listen mate, lets talk this thru'


never thought of that
SiegfriedThreads: 2
Posts: 103
Joined: Aug 8, 08 		  Aug 12, 08, 12:03 /  #
well, I think it's his last hope to break you ;)
say NO and see what happens... in poland we say: "If one loves, one will return" (or sth like this - my english is not very good).
EcoprincessThreads: 1
Posts: 40
Joined: Aug 4, 08 		  Aug 12, 08, 12:07 /  #
Siegfried:

well, I think it's his last hope to break you ;)
say NO and see what happens... in poland we say: "If one loves, one will return" (or sth like this - my english is not very good).


Your English is perfect; I took the middle road and said that I dont do ultimatums so he must make his own choice about what he now does.

God, I must be very annoying LOL
RakkyThreads: 10
Posts: 284
Joined: May 23, 07 		  Aug 12, 08, 12:10 /  #
Ecoprincess:

I dont do ultimatums

That's not annoying - that's honest and up-front. If he can't deal with that, he's not worth dealing with at all. Ultimatums are mini temper tantrums - and only babies have tantrums.
Lir   Aug 12, 08, 12:13 /  #
Siegfried:

in poland we say: "If one loves, one will return" (or sth like this - my english is not very good).


Do you mean the saying below ?

'If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were.'


:)
EcoprincessThreads: 1
Posts: 40
Joined: Aug 4, 08 		  Aug 12, 08, 12:17 /  #
Rakky:

Ultimatums are mini temper tantrums - and only babies have tantrums.

[quote=Lir]

Yes, it felt a bit like I was on the receiving end of a toddler tantrum.

Lir: 'If you love someone, set them free, If they come back they're yours :)

I rather like the "If one loves, one will return" - it would be also be true?
Lir   Aug 12, 08, 12:19 /  #
Ecoprincess:

it would be also be true?



I wouldn't know really. Just thought Siegrfrid may have been interested in the correct saying <even if it is in English >
SiegfriedThreads: 2
Posts: 103
Joined: Aug 8, 08 		  Aug 12, 08, 12:26 /  #
Lir:

oh, that's another one ;)
more romantic :>
my version is perfect when you drink in the pub with your mates, suddenly wife of your best friend comes in and says something like: "That's enought! It's over! You can stay at this pub forever". And then she storms out.
Naturally he wants to go after her, apologize and do other crazy things, but then...
you stand up with relaxed smile on your face and say "One loves, one will return. LET'S HAVE ANOTHER SHOT!"

:)
EcoprincessThreads: 1
Posts: 40
Joined: Aug 4, 08 		  Aug 13, 08, 09:20 /  #
Siegfried:

Naturally he wants to go after her, apologize and do other crazy things, but then...
you stand up with relaxed smile on your face and say "One loves, one will return. LET'S HAVE ANOTHER SHOT!"



ROFL :)
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