Can you stay friends after being in a relationship with someone ??

Quoting: Jambo

I think it is difficult but not impossible and it is great if you can.I suspect Scott is not happy about just being friends because he still has strong feelings for the woman and that is the heart of the problem.If you mutually decided to be friends that is okay but usually it is one persons decision more than the other persons and that is why it is difficult for the person who really wants to be more than friends. It is good to give it a try but if it is not working for you keep in contact but maybe best not to meet up and move on.

Sc0ttThreads: 7 Posts: 32 Joined: May 1, 07	Jul 18, 07, 14:51 / #
as above or have you found it's best just to cut ties altogether ?

buniaThreads: 1 Posts: 159 Joined: May 27, 07	Jul 18, 07, 15:04 / #
uh depends how deep relationship was and what was the reason of breaking it. I wish i could cut off my ex but i cant. Then again i wish i could stay in touch with a guy i was in the relationship ages ago but i cant. It really depends on people...

BellaThreads: - Posts: 7 Joined: Jul 18, 07	Jul 18, 07, 15:05 / #
hi scott, it depends on how you guys left off and how mature both parties are.

BubbaWooThreads: 46 Posts: 4,438 Joined: Sep 26, 06	Jul 18, 07, 15:09 / #
Quoting: bunia depends Quoting: Bella depends yeah...

PolskaDollThreads: 44 Posts: 4,134 Joined: Jun 15, 07	Jul 18, 07, 15:34 / #
Personal experience tells me that you can't. Even if you got on well with the guy. My last b/f was a complete and utter twat and he's still around on the edges of my circle of friends. He is slowly going away though! However, when on/off and I are off, we get on really well as friends! It just "depends" (to quote a couple of others).

WroclawThreads: 77 Posts: 7,404 Joined: Apr 1, 06 [Moderator]	Jul 18, 07, 16:35 / #
Quoting: Sc0tt Can you stay friends after being in a relationship with someone ?? Yes and No.

Lady in red	Jul 18, 07, 16:36 / #
The new broom sweeps clean but the old broom knows the corners. Old Barbadian Proverb

Sc0ttThreads: 7 Posts: 32 Joined: May 1, 07	Jul 18, 07, 16:49 / #
Quoting: Bella hi scott, it depends on how you guys left off and how mature both parties are. Well, she wants to stay friends but in the past i have never stayed friends with any ex's however i would like to at least give it a try . Met a couple of times now ,just as friends ,just feels awkward as hell with the stupid things like leaving each other at the end of the night ,i wish i could give her a hug ,to me it's like pretending & being fake because the real me wants to do that .... don't know if i like it :(

BubbaWooThreads: 46 Posts: 4,438 Joined: Sep 26, 06	Jul 18, 07, 16:59 / #
Quoting: Lady in red ..depends ... yeah

HAL9009Threads: 2 Posts: 329 Joined: Mar 13, 07	Jul 18, 07, 17:05 / #
yep, it's possible, if you both want to.......

Basco	Jul 19, 07, 03:49 / #
Hi scott I advice you to cut everything especially if you still love her

Remus707Threads: - Posts: 4 Joined: Jul 9, 07	Jul 19, 07, 09:31 / #
Question is here does either one of you LOVE each other ? If either one of you expect or want more then you should just let it slip away. It is never easy to maintain a friendship with someone you LOVE, but this is LOVE of the Physical sense. No-one can help you or the other party than the two of you. You must communicate well enough to establish wether this "Friendship" is really what is wanted on both parts. If it is not then decide together or forever depart?

AvJoeUK	Jul 19, 07, 12:48 / #
I can, but it takes two Id rather be friends with someone after a relationship then nothing at all. And If it gets thrown back in your face least you know where you stand.

tornado2007Threads: 20 Posts: 3,497 Joined: Jul 11, 07	Jul 19, 07, 14:56 / #
I like this question, its a good one, really i can't answer it, i've had a few girlfriends who either, i don't want to talk to after a break or they don't want to talk with me. on the other hand i have had others who really want to stay friends with and that i'm still friends with today, one of them who was cheating on me got married to my best mate about a year ago, i went to the wedding, i hold no grudges and thats how it should be but we don't live in a perfect world

shewolfThreads: 5 Posts: 1,834 Joined: Dec 23, 06	Jul 18, 07, 17:54 / #
Quoting: Sc0tt don't know if i like it :( if you don't like it, it can't be good.

beckskiThreads: 19 Posts: 2,147 Joined: May 15, 07 MEMBER	Jul 18, 07, 19:06 / #
Quoting: Sc0tt Can you stay friends after being in a relationship with someone ?? I find it rather difficult to stay friends with a guy after we've broken up. It feels somewhat uncomfortable bumping into an ex-boyfriend; especially knowing we've both seen each other naked before! A sincere thanks PF, for putting up with me FIVE terrific years, muah!

JamboThreads: 2 Posts: 157 Joined: Jun 11, 07	Edited by: Jambo Jul 19, 07, 03:12 / #
I think it is difficult but not impossible and it is great if you can.I suspect Scott is not happy about just being friends because he still has strong feelings for the woman and that is the heart of the problem.If you mutually decided to be friends that is okay but usually it is one persons decision more than the other persons and that is why it is difficult for the person who really wants to be more than friends. It is good to give it a try but if it is not working for you keep in contact but maybe best not to meet up and move on.

peterwegThreads: 35 Posts: 1,966 Joined: Feb 16, 07	Jul 19, 07, 06:26 / #
Quoting: Sc0tt Can you stay friends after being in a relationship with someone ?? Yes you can.

RakkyThreads: 10 Posts: 284 Joined: May 23, 07	Jul 19, 07, 07:56 / #
Yes, but not without a level of discomfort for each party. The one who will be the most comfortable is the one who wanted the break-up less (or is still infatuated with the person who they broke up with).

Sc0ttThreads: 7 Posts: 32 Joined: May 1, 07	Jul 19, 07, 14:52 / #
Quoting: Jambo I think it is difficult but not impossible and it is great if you can.I suspect Scott is not happy about just being friends because he still has strong feelings for the woman and that is the heart of the problem.If you mutually decided to be friends that is okay but usually it is one persons decision more than the other persons and that is why it is difficult for the person who really wants to be more than friends. It is good to give it a try but if it is not working for you keep in contact but maybe best not to meet up and move on. I think that about sums it up .Sadly i think moving on will be the outcome ,she wants me to be friends with her but it was her choice to not go further with our relationship .I just can't switch off my feelings for her at the click of my fingers . But as Joe also says ,it's better to have a little of something than nothing at all ..... decisions decisions .....

AvJoeUK	Jul 19, 07, 16:42 / #
Quoting: tornado2007 on the other hand i have had others who really want to stay friends with and that i'm still friends with today, one of them who was cheating on me got married to my best mate about a year ago, i went to the wedding, i hold no grudges and thats how it should be but we don't live in a perfect world Shitting Hell Tornado, my hats off to you man.

JamboThreads: 2 Posts: 157 Joined: Jun 11, 07	Jul 20, 07, 03:31 / #
In my case she wants to stay very good friends. We live together and get on really well. I told her ( I had not planned to it just sort of came out) last night when we were out at a restaurant in London I still cared for her and she was not happy with me saying that as she sees me as her best friend. I said I was being honest. Anyway the situation resolves itself when she relocates in one month as she has a new job. We will see much less of each other then.

davidpeakeThreads: 18 Posts: 515 Joined: Nov 7, 06	Jul 20, 07, 03:44 / #
very difficult decision to make, its up to each person to decide

Lady in red	Jul 20, 07, 06:59 / #
I think it depends on how intense the relationship was and whether the breakup was mutual. Sometimes, if you can't get over it and are hoping to reconcilliate, and the other person has moved on. Then I think it's best not to try and be close friends. Otherwise, you end up getting very disappointed. I also think, you can't move on if you are constantly there, as a friend for the other person. It's life unfortunately. Doesn't stop the hurt but why prolong the hurt if it is only one sided. Make new friends and move on is my motto ! You'll soon find somebody else.

JamboThreads: 2 Posts: 157 Joined: Jun 11, 07	Jul 20, 07, 07:54 / #
Very good advice from Lady in red.

sapphireThreads: 28 Posts: 1,418 Joined: Dec 7, 06	Jul 20, 07, 08:00 / #
. You can only remain friends if both of you have moved on emotionally, and usually when you were friends before you got into a relationship it works better.. otherwise you have never known anything other than the physical relationship.. and its all too easy to slip back to into this, but without any of the committment of a loving relationship and on a just good friends basis.. which inevitably ends up in someone getting hurt when one person wants to get back together and the other doesnt. Personally I feel you need time and distance between you to create a space between the relationship and the friendship.

rachvtThreads: - Posts: 27 Joined: Jul 1, 07	Jul 20, 07, 08:17 / #
Quoting: beckski I find it rather difficult to stay friends with a guy after we've broken up. It feels somewhat uncomfortable bumping into an ex-boyfriend; especially knowing we've both seen each other naked before! Yeah I tend to agree with this one... I find it really awkward, to say the least.

BellaThreads: - Posts: 7 Joined: Jul 18, 07	Jul 20, 07, 13:23 / #
Quoting: Jambo Scott is not happy about just being friends because he still has strong feelings for the woman and that is the heart of the problem. I agree with you, Jambo..... Quoting: Sc0tt I just can't switch off my feelings for her at the click of my fingers Quoting: Sc0tt i wish i could give her a hug , I think is better to move on and not being friends at all, I will end up hurting you even more..... been there, is very hard :-(

OlenkaThreads: 1 Posts: 20 Joined: Jul 22, 07	Jul 22, 07, 09:50 / #
It's better to cut ties, move on and not look back, I'm saying this from my own experience. If you stay friends eventually the person who cares more will be hurt and nobody really wants that. There is still a lot of people out there and soon you will make new friends and maybe have a new girlfriend, too. It's hard to make a good friendship from relationship which did not work out.