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Help! I just don't understand him..


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BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 19, 09, 15:46 /  #
I've been contemplating writing about this for a while now, so I think now is the time!

I met a 19 year old polish guy back last year (Im 18 by the way) and have been in contact with him ever since. When I was out there, the first night I met him he was very flirtatious, commenting how pretty I was, and always looking at me...
Anyway, I still talk to him on skype. Everytime I speak to him he continues to be flirty, commenting on how he can't wait to meet me again, and how he wonders 'how it would be'.
I'm driving myself insane, I think about him all the time, and he's also said how he 'thinks about me now and again and wonders how it would be when we meet again'. He always puts 'love you' or 'kocham cie' on the end of emails, but hasn't replied to my recent email when he usually does. It's not like he probably hasn't checked it because he's been online on skype but sometimes just signs straight back out :/
I always get these mixed feelings, but know when he speaks to me again, he'll continue to be quite romantic towards me. He often says how he is always happy when he speaks to me as well.
The catch is, he has a girlfriend, and now and again I'll ask if they are ok, and he always says 'yes' and changes the subject...he has said in the past that she can be quite a jealous person.

Can somebody help me understand this guy please? lol

Thanks!
x

Grzegorz_Threads: 81
Posts: 6,213
Joined: Nov 16, 06
  Jan 19, 09, 15:48 /  #
Kids...
Shawn_H   Jan 19, 09, 15:49 /  #
BlodynLily:
Can somebody help me understand this guy please?

BlodynLily:
The catch is, he has a girlfriend

Nuff said. He has a girlfriend. Not advisable to get in the middle of it. Wait until they are done with each other, then hunt him down.
polishgirltx   Jan 19, 09, 15:49 /  #
BlodynLily:
Can somebody help me understand this guy please? lol

that's easy... he's only 19, with a gf, hormones do its job... he's playing you...
dcchrisThreads: 11
Posts: 687
Joined: Oct 29, 07
  Jan 19, 09, 15:55 /  #
BlodynLily:
he has a girlfriend

why go any farther? say no more... really
WroclawThreads: 77
Posts: 7,404
Joined: Apr 1, 06
[Moderator]  Pictures: 3
  Jan 19, 09, 15:56 /  #
BlodynLily:
Can somebody help me understand this guy please?

He is keeping you sweet. And quite frankly... waiting for the moment he can bed you.

Then he'll simply disappear.
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 19, 09, 16:17 /  #
Eurgh.
I was afraid of answers like this lol
He doesn't seem like the type of guy to play me :/
Mind you, I've fell for guys like this before, except they haven't been polish lol
Are most Polish guys like this?
They all seem so nice....
Shawn_H   Jan 19, 09, 16:19 /  #
BlodynLily:
Are most Polish guys like this?

I will give you the patent PF Answer:

Some are, some aren't. Just like any culture / race / religion / gender / life forms.
polishgirltx   Jan 19, 09, 16:20 /  #
BlodynLily:
He doesn't seem like the type of guy to play me :/

he doesn't? he has a girlfriend and he's flirting with you... isn't clear enough?

BlodynLily:
Are most Polish guys like this?

no...

BlodynLily:
They all seem so nice....

do you know them all?
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 19, 09, 16:21 /  #
Hmm I guess.
Oh well, I'll just let nature take it's course :)

Thanks for the help though!
x
childwithinThreads: 15
Posts: 220
Joined: Nov 18, 08
  Jan 19, 09, 18:46 /  #
Grzegorz_:
Kids...

all very advanced
SokratesThreads: 19
Posts: 4,464
Joined: Jan 19, 09
[Suspended]
  Jan 19, 09, 19:35 /  #
BlodynLily:
Oh well, I'll just let nature take it's course :)

Pardon my french but that means he'll fuck you, live in fear of pregnancy and when you turn out not about to multiply he's gonna forget you ever existed.

Ps. yes we polish people are all bastards with 5 wives and 20 girlfriends, i lost count of how many kids i have though.
polishgirltx   Jan 19, 09, 19:43 /  #
Sokrates:
yes we polish people are all bastards with 5 wives and 20 girlfriends, i lost count of how many kids i have though.


don't scare her away... she just needs to realize what's going on... ;)
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 21, 09, 04:07 /  #
Haha well at least your being honest...
To be honest, I have a lot of common sense and would never just sleep with a guy because he sweet talks me.
I've decided Im going to ignore him for the time being, he can do what he wants :)
I guess things will become more clear in the future....
shyshkaThreads: -
Posts: 8
Joined: Sep 11, 08
  Jan 21, 09, 08:20 /  #
First of all, soz for being honest, but you appear to be insanely silly and simple minded girl...

He's not a single one and he said it to you straight way, tho he keeps flirting with you.
He surely IS playin with you, with no doubts. The thing is, that you have fallen for him.
Whole situation is quite clear even now. You'r just an exciting internet brief "romance" to him, tho undoubtly you would want it to be something more serious. In my opinion it wont be.
He doesnt treat you seriously at all, and keeps tellin and showing it to you straight way.
BlodynLily:
have a lot of common sense and would never just sleep with a guy because he sweet talks me.

Honestly i dare to think you would

Take care
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 21, 09, 09:26 /  #
you appear to be insanely silly and simple minded girl

I know, I probably am. But only when it comes to guys. But aren't most young girls?

He surely IS playin with you, with no doubts

Now so many people have said it. I think he is too. I'm dissapointed, because I always got the vibe that maybe him and his girlfriend wasn't working out, but oh well.

keeps tellin and showing it to you straight way.

Yes I always wondered why he was being quite forward after hardly knowing me. But I seemed to think that being open with somebody was just part of Polish culture...

and seriously, I would never so much as kiss a guy if I knew he had a girlfriend. I didn't even bother to react to him putting his arm around me when I first met him. I just somehow got taken in by his flattery. Something I will never do again :(

Thank you for your honesty
ShelleySThreads: 18
Posts: 3,647
Joined: Jun 26, 07
  Jan 21, 09, 10:48 /  #
BlodynLily:
Something I will never do again :(

You will, you have a crush, it will peeter out :) give it time.

shyshka:
First of all, soz for being honest, but you appear to be insanely silly and simple minded girl...

Let me be honest, you sound like a rude, obnoxious ****!
shyshkaThreads: -
Posts: 8
Joined: Sep 11, 08
Edited by: shyshka   Jan 21, 09, 11:52 /  #
ShelleyS:
Let me be honest, you sound like a rude, obnoxious cunt!

Am just saying things how they are, no fairytailes u dumpy ;) Honesty can hurts sometimes, but someone should persuade that poor girl senslessity of her acts. Words I used to express myself were apropriate to the occasion, apropriate to person i spoke to.

The End
MrBubblesThreads: 13
Posts: 768
Joined: Nov 13, 07
  Jan 21, 09, 12:00 /  #
shyshka:
Am just saying things how they are, no fairytails u dumpy

Don't sweat it - Shelly's had a face like an Easter island statue with an arse full of razor blades since she found out I was taken. I suppose it's a woman thing.

BlodynLily:
Can somebody help me understand this guy please? lol

He wants to put his sweet love on you and then settle down and marry someone else.
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 21, 09, 12:08 /  #
Honesty can hurts sometimes, but someone should persuade that poor girl senslessity of her acts

Im not senseless, just trying to make sense of the situation.

He wants to put his sweet love on you and then settle down and marry someone else.

But why on earth did he start this then if he knows in the long run he doesn't want anything out of it?
I guess some men are just complete arseholes :/ lol

Do you think I should confront him about it....? or bad idea?

Thanks x
MrBubblesThreads: 13
Posts: 768
Joined: Nov 13, 07
  Jan 21, 09, 12:11 /  #
BlodynLily:
ut why on earth did he start this then if he knows in the long run he doesn't want anything out of it?

Why do men climb Everest? Because it's there
SokratesThreads: 19
Posts: 4,464
Joined: Jan 19, 09
[Suspended]
Edited by: Sokrates   Jan 21, 09, 12:20 /  #
BlodynLily:
But why on earth did he start this then if he knows in the long run he doesn't want anything out of it?

Because having sex for the hell of it is fun.
BlodynLily:
I guess some men are just complete arseholes :/ lol

Only if you're stupid enough to let us.
BlodynLily:
Do you think I should confront him about it....? or bad idea?

If he didnt promise you anything and it was all just implications its a bad idea as he'll play stupid and you'll end up looking a raving desperate.

If he did promise you something its a bad idea because he's inconsiderate and will just tell you to piss off and you'll end up looking desperate.

So yeah its a bad idea, best thing is to let him go fuck himself or his girlfriend or whoever he wants as long as its not you.
Shawn_H   Jan 21, 09, 12:20 /  #
BlodynLily:
Do you think I should confront him about it....? or bad idea?

Only if he calls you. Ignore him. Drop him like a hot kartofle.
shyshkaThreads: -
Posts: 8
Joined: Sep 11, 08
  Jan 21, 09, 12:24 /  #
BlodynLily:
Im not senseless, just trying to make sense of the situation.

...... I was talking about the way you act toward this situation, which is SENSLESS, not about yourself. Whatever. LOL
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 21, 09, 12:27 /  #
best thing is to let him go fuck himself or his girlfriend or whoever he wants as long as its not you

Hahaha best piece of advice so far!

Ignore him. Drop him like a hot kartofle

Yeah I think I will :)
Do you think ignoring him will just make him want to try and chase me again though?
SokratesThreads: 19
Posts: 4,464
Joined: Jan 19, 09
[Suspended]
  Jan 21, 09, 12:32 /  #
BlodynLily:
Do you think ignoring him will just make him want to try and chase me again though?

Yes it will, we have this thing called ambition especially when its the dick thats doing the thinking for us, he'll keep it up untill you A. tell him to fuck himself. B. Let him fuck you.

In both cases the contact breaks off, in the first because you didnt want to have sex with him in the latter its because you had sex with him and he doesnt want anything more.

...

You know i just realised what a demoralised prick i used to be.
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 21, 09, 12:38 /  #
You know i just realised what a demoralised prick i used to be.

Lol can you relate to his situation then?
Well you know what they say, women are from Venus, men are from Mars, and it's so true!

As much as I hate to think of losing contact with him, do you think it would be better to remain friends, but just cut the whole flirting bullshit? I'll make it clear that I don't want to be his 'bit on the side'...
SokratesThreads: 19
Posts: 4,464
Joined: Jan 19, 09
[Suspended]
  Jan 21, 09, 12:42 /  #
BlodynLily:
As much as I hate to think of losing contact with him, do you think it would be better to remain friends, but just cut the whole flirting bullshit? I'll make it clear that I don't want to be his 'bit on the side'...

There's no such thing as friendship between a man and a woman and definitely not in your case, i'm not going to tell you what to do with all that, its up to you.
BlodynLilyThreads: 1
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 19, 09
  Jan 21, 09, 12:47 /  #
There's no such thing as friendship between a man and a woman and definitely not in your case

But I'm friends with loads of people that are guys (and I've never slept or done anything with them by the way)....
Hmm. I think I'll just talk to him now and again, but it I'm going to make it clear that it can't be like it was before. Give him the cold shoulder a bit....
Then if he cuts contact completely, it'll definately show that it wasn't our friendship he was interested in....

Thanks for your advice :D
ShelleySThreads: 18
Posts: 3,647
Joined: Jun 26, 07
  Jan 22, 09, 06:36 /  #
BlodynLily:
But why on earth did he start this then if he knows in the long run he doesn't want anything out of it?

Because he is a man, Polish men are exactly the same as the rest of them, only they seeem to be a little bit better at coving up their deceitfull behavour.

BlodynLily:
Do you think I should confront him about it....? or bad idea?

Delete him from your friends list in Skype and block him if he tries to contact you, if he asks why, tell him you don't speak to twats!

MrBubbles:
Shelly's had a face like an Easter island statue with an arse full of razor blades since she found out I was taken. I suppose it's a woman thing.

I'm over it now, I move on quite quickly Mr B, it was hard at first, but Im there now.

BlodynLily:
it'll definately show that it wasn't our friendship he was interested in....

Very rarely are men interested in just friendship, unless they are gay or you are a bit of a pig in knickers. It's a sad fact of life, get used to it.

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