Behaviour of users looking for relationship

The 'e' on My keeyboard got stuck, thank you for correction anyway, I allways try to improve.

We never desired to rule and exploit others and the little we achived in our country with our sweat we tried to defend, unfortunately our allies were cowards and traitors throughout history. Of course we did never have many allies to speak good of, due to our high-headness and arrogance.

Your very right :)

You are definately right on this:
Nationality, means nothing with how a person is in behavior, how he or she acts in a realationship, character and personality. If the guy or woman was mean to you, it's just them and nothing to do with where he or she was born on the planet.

Stop pointing fingers, and realize that it was just that person and nothing to do with anything else.

Very true! BUT...always a but (hahaha) ...aren't polish people brought up differently in poland compared to Americans? More strict?

I don't know about strict, but definitely with more values.

do they loose their values b/c they move to America?

I should think not, afterall its not where you live its how you live. At least thats what I was always brought up to believe

From someone who has dated most nationalities exception of India , I would say this is very true.
More specific on this please?

I think it's all to do with money. In a richer country you are made to feel inferior if you haven't got the latest TV, your kids are'nt wearing the latest gear. Out of date mobile etc. Don't get me wrong I'm not blaming this entirely on money but in a society where you have that kind of pressure AND you know as a woman you will be financially better off if you get divorced than stay married, the temptation and pressure can be too much.

Once the family unit has broken down morals and manners go to the bottom of the list of priorities. The only way to feel better is to buy more, so you get a credit card, max it out and get another to pay off that one, spend, feel better, max out, get another credit card. Then you can't afford to pay it off so you get your house reposessed.

No one can buy it because everyone is in the same situation. No one spends which sends the economy down hill and then the resession comes, out crawls the pimps and dealers and up rises the black economy.

The streets run with blood, children kill children, mothers become ****** and the men can't control anything because the Law has been changed in favour of the women and children and this stops the men from bringing back order.

It's just my theory anyway :o)

pandora69 good post, but don't men also share the blame in allowing such misplaced values to take precedence in richer nations?

I think it's to do with personality - rich or poor people can be bad



I think that again depends on the person, lots of friends of mine are divorced but their children are well mannered honest loving children.

The whole point of my thread was that we shouldn't generalise about people - be nation specific about relationships.

Not if the law is against them, sure, they want to and this leads to frustration, a loss of control. Women can handle that a lot better that guys.

I've seen so many changes in the last 30 years I couldn't begin to tell you. Your country will soon be westernized too. Give it 30 years and see the changes come, I bet you're starting to notice them already, the change from 2004 when you joined to now 2008.....noticed any changes.....are they all good.....?

Like I said, just theory

well how did the law end up "against them?"
I've been telling Poles this since 2001 ergo I come from a very "western" country, and while I probably have a very similar opinion as you on the slight of hand way western society is influenced, I wouldn't state anything too bold without being able to offer something beyond speculation. Can you do the same?

*f4 hopes he used "ergo" correctly cause he can never slide that one into his posts*

Yeah I see what your saying,

Ok for example, Smacking Children. It became an offence sometime at the end of the 80's (children's act was bought in 1989) now it is an offence to smack children; Social Services can take your children off you for it, or less even (THE STATE OWNS YOUR CHILDREN). Yet their are cultures in this country that can and do beat their children, they are left alone because it is a cultural thing and certain other cultures can't or won't involve them selves because they are crossing that fine cultural line. (hense so many horror stories involving children).

Men can't take a bath with their kids for example, it would be questioned today; and I used to love jumping in the bath with my dad, it was the highlight of my week.

It is a known fact, FACT (not theory) that I as a woman would be financially better off if I divorced. My husband wouldn't, in fact he would be financially stuck until my kids are 18, the law wouldn't prevent me using my kids as a weapon against my husband. Thats why 'Fathers 4 Justice' started in the 1990's (maybe before not sure on that one)

It was a very rare occurance 30 years ago, women were spat at if they got divorced and there was very little help. The laws changed to help vunerable people but over 30 years (and longer) divorce has become a profitable business for some women. WE are finding that less and less people want to get married but they still want kids, going back to the family unit breaking down or not being created in the first place.

Like I said, just my theory; I write what I see thats all.

What you see is what is. There is a PF member I know on this site who is a good mother and has run up against incredible diversity as well as question on how she should raise her children. I have custody of my son and get no support. What really gets me these days is the school system where kids get picked on for excellence. My son has developed the attitude of staying average to keep from being ridiculed. I do not imagine this is a problem in Poland as it is a big problem in the US. Pandora, Divorce has become a profitable business for the attorneys more than any one. And good to keep people in society with less money. That way they will be to busy thinking about working to live day to day rathere than complain about their government and out of control expenditures. And so on!

I do see your point, but I question where all the "brainwashing" started. And i do agree that the state should have almost nothing to do with the raisning of children and certainly have less rights than the parent does over their child (who the hell are they anyway but a bunch of crooked men and women). And yeah the divorce laws remind me of how unions function, there used to be a point but it seems more than ever their mandate is to abuse power and generally reward laziness. So all in all i do see your points about the decay of the family's status as an entity in western society. It's sad but i do agree with you.

Where in the world do you feel the family unit is stronger? I hear farm families in Poland are strong. I do not know other places well enough. Maybe you do? and if you do , please elaborate>

Depending where you live. Some states allow parents to hit children as form of discipline.

Not unless it's split custody, which is happening a lot right now. Even when the baby is a few months old and breastfeeding, they still take it away from the mother and placed with the father half the time. The law has become out of hand. A baby needs the mother more than the father because men don't have that nurturing feeling and can't nurse. It is the fathers who screwed up this law so they don't have to pay child support. He gets the woman pregnant, she has to suffer for 9 months, delivers the baby, most often she has the insurance and pays for it all and the guy doesn't do anything but yet when he divorces her, he gets away without paying anything.

This is getting to depressing All to real and out of control.

True say.... It's getting like this here. There are too many solicitors now...The working class worked their asses off so their children could become doctors or lawyers... we have too many doctor's and lawyors now so they're creating civil offences to keep em in work, hence the compensation culture and plastic surgery. I know 16 year olds having breast implants (WHATS GOING ON). You never got that 30 years ago, we was a poor country in the 70's



It never used to be a problem here either.

Sadly, on proven occasion, big players in peadiphile rings.



That completely sums it up in a 'nut shell' mate.



We didn't see it coming mate, remember this and file it at the back of your mind.



I respect your comments but I would have to disagree with this one. A daughter needs her father, how she relates to her father is how she will form relationships with men through out her life.



Greed screwed up this law.



It's very rare a woman suffers for the full 9 months. Pregnancy isn't an illness it is a gift (I've had three).



I guess you've never heard if the CSA then. They even put an 'attachment of earnings' on their wages. Guys have to pay here


Thanks for your comments guys, i've enjoyed replying to this.

When my wife had my son I paid . Now I have him and she owes me and does not pay and she grosses 10 k a month?????

to clarify, i was not referring to Poland with that comment but a lil more "west."

Interesting !

This thread is about relationships - not about maintenance payments! feck off my thread!

amythest, is that you?
meaning there are degrees of westernizing winds (social phenomenon in question here) that more or less started in the "west" and are spreading, in effect making ever european country for better or worse more "western." I for one am glad there is more emphasis on family here in Poland than in much of the English speaking (western) countries.

Lets hope we can rectify the damage that's already been done here.. I'm an optimist, I believe we can. I do know of the odd Polish couple that have seperated while being here, in order to have a decent standard of living you need both parents in full time work and that puts so much pressure on the family unit., my mortgage is £830 per month, 10 years ago I was paying £350 per month, rapid change has come in such a short space of time.

That is nice to read! I am affraid some democratic western philosophy has pollute the wold in some ways not for the good of anyone. Yet some good thing have come of it in earlier years. Now it seem the philosophy is just Big business power brokers and idealists of few with much power due to wealth Money-Power-Control
Yes, this is affecting relationships everywhere. It all comes in to play.

Yes, but you must be the only person on the forum who didn't realise! :)

So, ShelleyS, are you like multiple personalities or what? Oh, you would be a fun one to partner up with. lol

It is: if it's original it's an earner but it doen't make it true. Seems wise people are left behind, but they're wise and they know thats the best place to be.

Let's take the saying 'A leopard never changes his spots'. Whoever invented that saying should be shot because all the sheep in the flock have followed this one. When someone says to me (usually in a high, whiny, pessimistic voice)
"eewwww.. they won't change... a leopard never changes his spots". I have this uncontrollable urge to slap 'em up-the-face' for being so bloody narrow minded.........However, I am seeking theropy an' hoping to be sectioned under 'The Mental Health Act 1978'.

Now take the saying 'A still river runs deep'. I would like to meet the person who invented this saying. A very wise person indeed.