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my boyfriend is on a polish dating site


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zabko
  Jun 28, 08, 06:21  #1

I have recently discovered that my boyfriend of 3 years who is Polish has been subscribing to a Polish dating website. I have asked him about it and he said that he is not looking for anyone else and that he is only interested in talking to people online and not meeting. Can this really be true? Any advice welcome, I am truly broken hearted.

 
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espana
Edited by: espana  Jun 28, 08, 06:29  #2

dont worry , he only probably wanted to have sex with other people

 
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miranda
  Jun 28, 08, 06:31  #3

well? what do you think?

I think it is over for both of you. Harsh but true.

 
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Grzegorz_
  Jun 28, 08, 06:43  #4

zabko:
Can this really be true?


Yes or no...

 
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okgirl66
  Jun 28, 08, 06:47  #5

Hi Zabko, sorry to hear that this has happened to you. I would be really suspicious of my bloke subscribing to a dating website especially as it's in a language that I couldn't understand very well - if at all. Sadly, I think that your boyfriend can't be really serious about his relationship with you. You could try telling him that it really upsets you and that you want him to stop using the website and see what reaction you get. Also, keep your options open as you might meet some-one else who would make a better partner for you. Also, see if you can get your boyfriend to open up about what he's playing at and what's going on in his head. Let him know that you're not happy and want to sort things out.

 
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Wroclaw [Moderator]
  Jun 28, 08, 06:50  #6

If it was a fee paid website I would question it

If he is just jumping around one or two websites and taking a look... less serious

On the other hand, if I were looking at dating sites I might find myself answering some serious questions.

 
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szkotja2007
  Jun 28, 08, 07:07  #7

zabko:
Polish dating website

Whats the name ? Any links ?
:-)

Could be a social networking site which is a bit different than a subscription to a dating site.

 
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zabko
Edited by: zabko  Jun 28, 08, 07:15  #8

it is polishdating.co.uk and he is subscribing to it as ive seen his bank statements. I have asked him and he just said why not. A few months ago he registered and said it was only for fun, but now he has subscribed. He says he loves me and we live together, but now I feel that I cant trust him and we are on the verge of moving to another house together. I have also just lent him a large amount of money.

 
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wildrover
  Jun 28, 08, 07:17  #9

zabko:
he is not looking for anyone else


Possibly true....but you need to find out more......

 
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zabko
  Jun 28, 08, 07:19  #10

Your Reply re: my boyfriend is on a polish dating site

i have just registered on the site myself and think I have found his profile, which says he is looking for love, romance and sex! Can it really be innocent that he just likes chatting to people.. he is always on the internet.

 
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szkotja2007
  Jun 28, 08, 07:23  #11

zabko:
i have just registered on the site myself

Why don't you anonymously send him an e-mail through the site ?

 
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miranda
  Jun 28, 08, 07:23  #12

zabko:
which says he is looking for love, romance and sex!

sorry to hear that but the answer in right there.

 
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zabko
  Jun 28, 08, 07:26  #13

szkotja2007:
Why don't you anonymously send him an e-mail through the site ?

i thought about that, but I have to pay money to do so and Im not that desperate.

miranda:
orry to hear that but the answer in right there.

but do you think he is only chatting and not really wanting to meet anyone? He doesnt have a photo on there.

I know in my heart it is wrong, but I love him so much I cant bear the thought of us not being together.

 
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wildrover
  Jun 28, 08, 07:28  #14

zabko:
I know in my heart it is wrong


When your head tells you its wrong also...then you will know what to do....Sorry , but i think you have a guy you can,t trust.....only a matter of time till he finds some sex and romance with some girl......

 
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szkotja2007
  Jun 28, 08, 07:29  #15

zabko:
but do you think he is only chatting

Zabko - sorry but....
your boyfriend has paid to join a dating site -
he says he wants love, romance and sex -

it hurts but thats the truth of it.

 
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Wroclaw [Moderator]
  Jun 28, 08, 07:30  #16

Check the computer history... to see where else he is going.

If he has wiped the history... he might be hiding something.

 
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espana
Edited by: espana  Jun 28, 08, 07:30  #17

who is him: what is the name?
KISIEL23
Przemekkk27
Mario2502



katarzynkaa is a nice ***** cat!!!!!!

 
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miranda
Edited by: miranda  Jun 28, 08, 07:32  #18

zabko:
I know in my heart it is wrong, but I love him so much I cant bear the thought of us not being together.

It is time to have a serious conversation with him. I don't advice to sent him an e-mail, becuase you wold be playing his game and I don't think that it is a way to go in such situation. If he is paying moeny to flirt with other women, then he is just not that commited to you. I am sorry but it is time for an action on your part regardless how painfull truth you going to discover. He is not even your friend if he thinks it is OK to flirt with other women behind your back.

Do you want a life with somebody like that?

 
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okgirl66
  Jun 28, 08, 07:34  #19

zabko:
I know in my heart it is wrong, but I love him so much I cant bear the thought of us not being together.


I know it's hard but you must love yourself too and that means confronting him with what he's doing and sorting it out. Otherwise, if you don't, it will eat away at you and you won't be happy. Also I would be careful about lending him large amounts of money. Can this guy be trusted. Be good to yourself and have this out with him. If he respects you at all, he will respond to your questions and maybe you can get the truth from him.

 
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zabko
Edited by: zabko  Jun 28, 08, 07:36  #20

he always wipes the history on the computer and hides his phone. Last night he told me he was working away and there was no network, but when I called him hiding my number he answered right away. I know when we talk he will accuse me of being stupid. I dont want to leave him unless I am 100% sure he is cheating as I love him. I also just took out a bank loan to help him out even though Im really in debt myself, so now what to do about that.

 
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szkotja2007
  Jun 28, 08, 07:39  #21

zabko:
I know when we talk he will accuse me of being stupid.

He is going to say you are stupid
he will get angry with you
he will make you feel paranoid
he will make you doubt yourself
he will make you feel bad for accusing him of these things
he will act hurt
etc etc etc

 
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espana
  Jun 28, 08, 07:40  #22

zabko:
was no network, but when I called him hiding my number he answered right away

try to get your money back and leave him

 
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miranda
  Jun 28, 08, 07:42  #23

zabko:
he always wipes the history on the computer and hides his phone. Last night he told me he was working away and there was no network, but when I called him hiding my number he answered right away. I know when we talk he will accuse me of being stupid. I dont want to leave him unless I am 100% sure he is cheating as I love him. I also just took out a bank loan to help him out even though Im really in debt myself, so now what to do about that.

sounds like he has you wrapped around his finger, so it is time to safe yourself more loans in the future and kick him out. You need to be firm, it is your money, your health and your future. He is using you.

 
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Wroclaw [Moderator]
  Jun 28, 08, 07:42  #24

If he goes he'll take the money with him.
What is the money for ?

 
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wildrover
  Jun 28, 08, 07:42  #25

zabko:
I dont want to leave him unless I am 100% sure


Nobody likes to believe that somebody they care for is doing the dirty on them....but sorry to say..this guy is not to be trusted....He is up to something girl , and if he,s not telling you about it , there is something very wrong with your relationship.....Of course he is going to tell you not to be silly....well i am telling you not to be silly , he is up to something , and you know it.....

 
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okgirl66
  Jun 28, 08, 07:44  #26

zabko:
he always wipes the history on the computer and hides his phone. Last night he told me he was working away and there was no network, but when I called him hiding my number he answered right away. I know when we talk he will accuse me of being stupid. I dont want to leave him unless I am 100% sure he is cheating as I love him. I also just took out a bank loan to help him out even though Im really in debt myself, so now what to do about that.


This is serious. I'd say I'm 99.9% sure he's cheating on you. Please look after yourself and get a friend to help you move out and get a break from this guy. If he won't pay you the money back that you gave him then that's hard. But ask him why he can pay subscriptions on the internet when you need his help financially yourself?! Don't give him any more money and leave ASAP. Sorry to tell you this but I think that in the long run you will be glad you did this and it will make him face up to his own problems too.

 
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zabko
  Jun 28, 08, 07:45  #27

Wroclaw:
If he goes he'll take the money with him.
What is the money for ?

a car which he just got last week. He couldnt get a loan so i took it out in my name but the log book is in his name so I guess that means I cant repossess it. Apart from that he owes me other money too as I am always helping him

 
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Wroclaw [Moderator]
  Jun 28, 08, 07:48  #28

okgirl66:
will make him face up to his own problems too.


I doubt this. He is the one with the money and now in control.

 
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wildrover
  Jun 28, 08, 07:48  #29

zabko:
Apart from that he owes me other money too


He sounds like a real con man.....cut your losses girl....get out of there.....

 
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Grzegorz_
  Jun 28, 08, 07:49  #30

zabko:
Apart from that he owes me other money too as I am always helping him


Maybe he's a male ***** ?

 
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