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EU ANNOUNCEMENT: English language is now official world language


posts: 12
 
dannyboy
Edited by: Admin  May 17, 07, 09:03  #1

European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".


pearblossomschool.com/illution.html

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ukpolska
  May 17, 07, 09:14  #2

Seen it before, still funny though:)

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Grzegorz_
  May 17, 07, 09:21  #3

EU is just wasting our money to say obvious things.

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ukpolska
  May 18, 07, 09:54  #4

Quoting: Grzegorz_
EU is just wasting our money to say obvious things.

WTF dumb lol

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AvJoeUK [Guest]
  May 18, 07, 10:10  #5

No such thing as euro english :)

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Hueg
  May 18, 07, 10:18  #6

Quoting: AvJoeUK
No such thing as euro english



Not yet. Hence the clever and oh so subtle use of the word phase-in. That'll be the giant neon flashing sign breaking into life.

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AvJoeUK [Guest]
  May 18, 07, 10:24  #7

Whatever It is, Id love to see how it turns out :P

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Hueg
Edited by: Hueg  May 18, 07, 10:27  #8

Av mate. It's a joke. I can't see you suffer anymore.

Sorry Dannyboy:

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in
plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k".
This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan
have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. !


edited for legiblity

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AvJoeUK [Guest]
  May 18, 07, 10:29  #9

Hah, too late I began to cut :D

Its national gullable day too.

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Hueg
  May 18, 07, 10:31  #10

No that was last week Honest.

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Zgubiony
  May 18, 07, 10:32  #11

hahaha :D


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dannyboy
  May 18, 07, 10:57  #12

haha, huegel I had originally post the full joke but the admin editted it himself to improve the 'surprise'.

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