Everyone getting married?

Lately it feels like I have been caught in a weird little twilight zone of friends now getting married and engaged. And it really hit me the other day when my x got engaged. It's weird .. bc he's only 23 and the odd thing is that it kinda turns my stomach bc of the hell he put me threw ... but it's like why are people rushing to get to forever? I have been in too many weddings of friends and so far there are 2 divorces bc they rushed into things. Puppy love and lust do not last ,you really have to know every flaw and strength , all the goals and expectations, do you want kids and ect. But wow people get caught up in the wedding ohh its gonna be great and then forget about the actual marriage .. what's wrong here? 20 somethings are rushing off to get married to people they do not even know well and they want take whole fantasy idea of marriage but you have to take the good and the bad . It's a big life changing moment not changing oil in the car? For me right now it went from fun to scary because before you really don't think in the future that far with who ever you are dating but now marriage is springing into this bubble and it's scary and I can't believe that they rush into it blind to rush out with sooo much heart ache. Why are people soo impatient? Forever is a long time why rush when you are young to get to that alter ? It's amazing when you find that special moment but now a days there are soo many divoces you really need to talk about everything with your other half goals , expectations, past histories, ect, so there are no suprises . It's just odd to me , bc love is wonderful but you need to be on the same page before you jump to a new chapter.

I'm guessing that you're using this post to get your thoughts down in writing, trying to make sense of how you feel about everyone getting married.

The important thing to bear in mind is that you've got to do what's right for you. Try not to get sucked into comparing yourself where other people are in their lives.... it's not a race :)

I've been happily married since my late 20s (am 32 now), and now I'm seeing a lot of my friends have children. That's brilliant for them, but there's no way that I am ready for children right now - too many other things going on right now. But I'll take things at my own pace.

It's just akward how quickly the line of just dating turns into we have to get married right away.

Nah... it's just a sign that we're all getting old :)

Maybe ..

marriage is way, WAY overrated. :)

I second that

all those who agree say Yeah!... all those who opose.. well, don't say a thing.. :D :D

The man from Del Monte didn't say yes this time

I so know what you mean it's getting like noah's arc in mind part of the world everyone in pairs. I agree with Pkl marriage is way overrated. If it ain't broke don't marry it but then I suppose you could also say if it is broke don't marry it esp the more money orientated amongst us so the conclusion of it all is don't marry anyone under any circumstances, if you do forever you will be doomed to thinking it a treat to go around Ikea on a saturday afternoon and you will use 'we' instead of I as part of normal conversation erk....

Well the whole "we " talking is mostly the more dominant of the two who is making 99% of the decision anyway . But I really don't know What happened to just getting to know someone, really getting to know them. It scares me that there is this rush that is added now a adays and I feel a little torn at times too because It would be wonderful to be married BUT when it is right not because it's the it thing to do or because some magazines say I might be too old by the time im 27 which is rediculous! I'm 22 so there is completely no rush . Everything takes time and in this high speed world now waiting to go to the alter is like pulling teeth. Why rush to into forever without being sure? I get the whole "love" thing but is it Love or is it Lust? It's really sad if you take a look at all these people that are divorced and now a days it's becoming normal for a divorced person to be divorced several times!!! It's crazy I have been dating my bf for 2 1/2 yrs and a friend of ours and his gf were baffled that our parents haven't met already ( to dicuss marriage) , and that we took our time getting to know each other and fall for each other with out bs before we said those three little words. AND they just started dating like 4 months not even, already he got her a journey necklace which is supposed to represent the time you have spent with a person getting to know them and memories ect. I was in tears laughing like what is this great journey you are on here ? Trying to figure out how many people it takes to screw in a light bulb maybe... Buy the rate they are going they will be down that isle and crying when the bill from the lawyers come.

better to be single

But not alone !

I've been married and divorced twice, at 43.
Life is for living and being adventurous. I would marry again, if the right opportunity (PERSON) came along.
If people stopped thinking that marriage is forever, then more would not be afraid to marry and just experience the pleasures involved. Years ago, marriage meant until one of you died and people died much younger. Now marriage means until you are 70, 80, 90 plus so little wonder people are scared to commit.
I am not cynical about marriage at all, marry if it makes you both happy.
I would never be prepared to live with a man and never get married to him.
If the majority of people here have happily married parents still, then surely thats more a reason to have the same for yourself, if you can find it but you're never going to know unless you do it.

i am not sure you ever really know someone-sometimes people change so what felt right and lead to marriage-can feel wrong?how long do you take to get to know someone?-what is the reason to marry?-to inform the world of you love? finacial security? children?companionship?

when i married it was for all of those things-i didnt expect to get divorced i saw marriage as a committment for life- sickness health richer poorer etc- and i thought my x-husband felt the same-but he had a different idea-once the kids were "old" enough we should go our separate ways-something he failed to communicate-but in his mind he couldnt see what was wrong with this.

i would get married again for all the reasons stated earlier

exactly I think alot of people run into marriage blindly with out talking about everything . I have seen that happen already with a few friends and it's that puppy love stage but you really need to know it all and they need to know you too what goals and expectations you have and vice versa and you have to keep communicating threw all that no matter what and some people jsut get tunnel vision with the whole puppy love what happens after the goo gooo gaa gaa phase has lifted?

I agree, getting married shows that you want to be committed to the relationship for life.

And if that is not the case, why would you want to get married?

Nothing is for life anymore, jobs, or marriage.

Try it, if it doesn't work, get diivorced and try again. Marriage isn't the problem, its the options we sometimes get wrong.