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Use of Kochanie


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SunflowerThreads: 15
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 Jul 26, 07, 16:53    #1
Hi all, could you tell me if "Kochanie" is a term you would use to address a friend, for example a male friend.. or is it "too" friendly, if you know what I mean? Or can it be used to say "sweetie" or "dearie"? I know my Polish friend sometimes calls her little baby boy "moje kochanie".. but then that's another way of using it....

ZgubionyThreads: 21
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 Jul 26, 07, 16:55    #2
If it were me? I'd take it as if you were calling me your sweetheart.
SunflowerThreads: 15
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 Jul 26, 07, 17:00    #3
Really? mmm ok.... that's interesting... one of my good friends knows a Polish girl and she has started to text him with "Kochanie". He asked me about it and I said I'd ask everyone on here. Mmm.. she already has a boyfriend too.. so it would never just be used in a friendly context then between a man and a woman?
ZgubionyThreads: 21
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 Jul 26, 07, 17:03    #4
Others can take it differently though. I guess it depends on who says it to you. I'm sure others will have a comment.
dannyboyThreads: 24
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 Jul 26, 07, 17:17    #5
I would certainly not like it if my partner called someone else kochanie apart from her son.

If it were a little bit of flirting, I would get over it, but on an SMS, no way - I would not feel comfortable with that.
SunflowerThreads: 15
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 Jul 26, 07, 17:27    #6
Quoting: dannyboy
I would certainly not like it if my partner called someone else kochanie apart from her son.

If it were a little bit of flirting, I would get over it, but on an SMS, no way - I would not feel comfortable with that.


ok, thanks for that.. it does sound like she's coming on to him then.. oh dear....
PolskaDollThreads: 44
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 Jul 26, 07, 17:35    #7
Can 'kochanie' not be used as a friendly term like here in Britain some friends say to each other 'how are you darling?'. Maybe like 'jak sie masz kochanie' to a friend???
KrzysztofThreads: 2
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 Jul 26, 07, 20:46    #8
Quoting: PolskaDoll
Can 'kochanie' not be used as a friendly term like here in Britain some friends say to each other 'how are you darling?'.


yes, it could be that way, like almost anything depending on context and interpersonal relations, but both persons involved in such case should know/feel that the word shouldn't by taken literally, that there's another meaning to it (for example "Kochanie moje" said by a man to a woman, more seldom viceversa, but also possible, both more or less the same age, the speaking person older than the other, and it should be said with a little changed intonation, no so affectedly, would be simply patronising - the way you could address your kid who just did something bad/stupid.) Otherwise, without all this "extraverbal" extenuating circumstances, so in 99.99% cases, it's simply "my sweetheart/ my love"

Quoting: PolskaDoll
like here in Britain some friends say to each other 'how are you darling?'. Maybe like 'jak sie masz kochanie' to a friend???


For me it would be acceptable between women, as at least some of them have a tendency to use slighty more affected language, but in a mam-man or man-woman conversation, rather not.

But as I read in other thread (about the word "pig"), someone's gf calls him "often baranie" and it's OK, while in almost any other cases it would be, more or less, but definitely offending.
So you may alter the socially accepted meaning of many words, but both parts must know the rules of this "game", which I guess is identical both in Polish and in other languages/cultures.
RanjThreads: 27
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Edited by: Ranj  Jul 26, 07, 21:10    #9
Quoting: Sunflower
Hi all, could you tell me if "Kochanie" is a term you would use to address a friend, for example a male friend.. or is it "too" friendly, if you know what I mean? Or can it be used to say "sweetie" or "dearie"?

I have some Polish friends and when I say "kochanie", I usually mean sweety.....doesn't mean I have a romantic feeling towards the person.....that's just how I address people I care about......I do refer to my beloved as "sweety", but he knows that it is in an entirely different context.....;) For myself, I always let people know I care or love them when I'm saying goodbye (whether it be by phone, or in person) because I know how short life can be, and I don't want anyone in my life second-guessing how I felt about them or how they have affected my life......
PolishXBarbieThreads: 3
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 Jul 26, 07, 21:44    #10
I use it, I think its friendly to use for either sex.
PolishXBarbieThreads: 3
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 Jul 26, 07, 21:44    #11
just dont mix up kochana and kochanie lol
MarzenaThreads: 2
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 Jul 26, 07, 23:45    #12
Quoting: Krzysztof
yes, it could be that way, like almost anything depending on context and interpersonal relations, but both persons involved in such case should know/feel that the word shouldn't by taken literally, that there's another meaning to it (for example "Kochanie moje" said by a man to a woman, more seldom viceversa, but also possible, both more or less the same age, the speaking person older than the other, and it should be said with a little changed intonation, no so affectedly, would be simply patronising - the way you could address your kid who just did something bad/stupid.) Otherwise, without all this "extraverbal" extenuating circumstances, so in 99.99% cases, it's simply "my sweetheart/ my love"

Very very good explanation Krzysztof!
sledzThreads: 29
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 Jul 27, 07, 00:19    #13
Guys dont use " moja kochanie" if you live in the US

its too strong at first........

I understand it sounds good
HoneybeeThreads: 7
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 Jul 30, 07, 22:02    #14
Ok, ok, let me get this straight. Kochanie may be used to convey romantic feelings OR as a sweet term of endearment.

For example, last week at a party I threw for a male friend of mine, as he was making to leave, he gave me a hug, full embrace, and told me he loved me. I didn't say anything. Not because I don't feel the same, but because I didn't know if I heard what I heard. My grandmother who was standing quite close to us and is blind, says she heard him loud and clear. My question is this, if I use kochanie with him, will he think it's love or because I'm calling him a "pet name" or what? I hope that made sense.
psyko514  Jul 25, 08, 23:51    #15
Sorry to revive an old thread, but I'm kinda limited right now and just have a quick question: What is the proper pronunciation of "kochanie"?

Thanks!
cjjcThreads: 37
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 Jul 26, 08, 15:49    #16
Ok so I'm English and I'm learning so don't flame me but I'd guess phonetically it would be:

co-ha-nye

:)
glamrockxxThreads: -
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 Jul 26, 08, 20:21    #17
PolishXBarbie:
just dont mix up kochana and kochanie


Why? lol Polish is so confusing to me. What's the difference? And what is kochany? For a guy right?
kjerstiThreads: 1
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Edited by: kjersti  Jul 26, 08, 20:30    #18
glamrockxx:

Why? lol Polish is so confusing to me. What's the difference? And what is kochany? For a guy right?



from what i understand (which is not a lot at all) Kochana is more like 'my love' and kochanie is more like darling, dearest.. right? so one would be a little more intense?

Kochanie sounds really feminine to me for some reason.

do girls say that to their boyfriends a lot in Polish is it usually just vice versa?
Ewelinka86Threads: -
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Edited by: Ewelinka86  Oct 23, 08, 05:52    #19
You use the word 'kochanie' when you address something to your partner(male and female) fe: Kochanie(Honey) can you do shopping after work? It shouldn't be used for friends as it's too personal. However, 'kochana'(which means you talk to woman) or 'kochany'(male) is often used as a friendly way of addressing friend fe: Kochana are we going out after work?- which means that you ask your female friend to go out. However these 2 words are more likely to be used by girls as used by guys can seem to be taken as homosexual way of talking(if said to men) or offering more than you wanted( by talking to woman). My advice is to use them carefully and the best only to your partner. But also you can use them in a sarcastic way and then feel free to try
MirelleThreads: -
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 Oct 27, 08, 09:21    #20
My polish friend (women) calls me "slonecko" or "kochanie" - depends on her mood. And i call my partner "kochanie" but i would never say it to another man.
ihaveaquestion  Sep 11, 09, 17:34    #21
hello everyone, i would like to know what is the gender of the word kochanie, is it male or female... or neither. when speaking with my girlfriend should i use moja kochanie?
VincentThreads: 15
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 Sep 11, 09, 17:47    #22
It looks neutral so it would be moje. Someone will say if I'm wrong :)
SeanusThreads: 22
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 Sep 11, 09, 22:18    #23
Moja kochanie, moje kochanie and mój kochanie could all be used informally (semantically) but, gramatically, Vincent is right. Moje kochanie is the most correct as kochanie is neutral (it).
pgtxThreads: 49
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 Sep 11, 09, 22:21    #24
Seanus:
Moja kochana, moje kochanie and mój kochany


SeanusThreads: 22
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 Sep 11, 09, 22:33    #25
Gramatically, those are the correct versions, yes. However, the others are semantically ok. PGTX, you must know that Polish is a living language and that Poles often use incorrect grammar.
pgtxThreads: 49
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 Sep 11, 09, 22:37    #26
Seanus:
Poles often use incorrect grammar.

it doesn't mean that non-Poles have to learn with mistakes...
jump_bunnyThreads: 8
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 Sep 11, 09, 22:42    #27
pgtx:
it doesn't mean that non-Poles have to learn with mistakes...

I agree!
SzwedwPolsceThreads: 13
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Edited by: SzwedwPolsce  Sep 11, 09, 23:00    #28
Kochanie is of the neutral gender, and the most correct form is moje. But many people use moja as well.
SeanusThreads: 22
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 Sep 11, 09, 23:10    #29
Eh, evolution? Look at how English has evolved. For example, people almost always said 'a historic event'. They may say 'an historic event' now. I confirmed the grammatical accuracy of moja kochana, mój kochany and moje kochanie but also pointed out the living aspect of the language. After all, the title is 'use of kochanie' and not merely its grammatical soundness.
huciusr  Aug 4, 10, 21:22    #30
usually You should use "kochanie" to someone You love or are in a relationship with (as darling, honey, babe). but to a friend You should use "kochana" (female friend) or kochany (male friend)

:)


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