Your Thoughts about 20 Year Age Difference Between Men & Women in Poland?

Maybe you can elaborate then we can maybe judge if you are a reasonable average metropolitan Polish guy or some sort of bigot

The primary purpose of marriage is procreation. The fertility percentage in women is peak between the ages of 16 and 24. Where as the sperms are produced in Men until the age of 75. Medically there can be age difference of 4 to 18 years between husband and wife, with husband being elder.

@rameshrjau: you must be an absolute scream at dinner parties.

A ;)

Not sick. I am a 42 year old woman and I am dating a 20 year old. We spent months ignoring how we felt before we finally decided it was meant to be. Both sets of friends have come round to the idea and are happy for us right NOW. It may not last forever but who are we hurting? No one.

sick! disgusting! :P hahaha kidding, age is nothing in a relationship ;)

Just enjoy yourselves for as long as it feels good for you two.

;)

Watching my mother and step father with him being 22 years older was difficult. Everything was great for them when they were 30 and 52, and even a bit longer. But troubles came when he was 65 and she was 43, and later at 70 and 48, he 80 and she 58.,etc.

My mother still had a lot of life left in her, and alot of living she wanted to do, since the children were finally grown. But his health was starting to fail, after heart attacks, and severe arthritis, and natural older age health issues -- they couldn't do things like when they were younger. He didn't or couldn't do things anymore, but always wanted her by his side. He passed away when he was 92, and she was then 70.

She's making efforts to live her life now, but it's getting more difficult for her, and she hates being alone in her aging years.

Just something to think about. The golden years aren't so golden, when you're going through them separately

She gave up almost 25 years of happiness and living her life to take care of an invalid.

Well actually im 21 and im in love with a 46 year old! so there's avtually 25 years and not 20,so as long as you know what you're striving for i guess there is no problem what so ever! As long as u are both happy together than go for it!

In Germany women date men of the same age.In CR 2-3 years older,in Poland 5-7 years older and in Ukraina 10-15 years older.So Slavic women have an affection for older men while western girls worship youth.

...or slavic boys need alot longer to grow up to real men!

;)

Not everyone wants children. If that is the case, then an OW/YM relationship can work very well. Or they can work well for a time. Some older women know that the day will come when their young man leaves, but they are happy for the present time. Love happens. I've been married to a man seven years older, and in relationships since then with much younger men. It's the person rather than the age.

If you look at divorces and breakups, being the same age or slightly older/younger makes no difference. No one can predict the future.

And yes, statistically, the younger partner will have to take care of the older one most likely. But then, the younger person could wind up an invalid, too and if you are married that is part of the vow you make to each other. You go into it hopefully with eyes wide open.

My cousin is married to a man 25 years her senior, but she is a very difficult person to live with.
My Dad say my cousin's husband must have done something really bad and that she is now his punishment.

rameshrjau, did you read the book "What Men Know About Women" by Abdul Smith?

I'm a 52 year old man and I have seen the younger older relationships work just fine! My mom and my step dad was almost 30 years apart and they loved each other so much and was very happy until he passed away and she now misses him so much but if you ask her she would not have changed a thing in their lives together so I believe it is possible for to people to love each other even if their ages are very far a part!

People say that because someone is younger than their mate that chance are they will be left alone in time but in 52 years I have learned that tomorrow is not promised to anyone no matter their age, old people die but young people also die so just because two people are separated by age doesn't mean that the younger person will out live the older person! So why should people let age or anything stand in the way of love, we limit are chance of find true love by placing limits on love!

I was looking at the list of people who applied for marriage licenses in a local paper. One was for a 63 year old woman and a 25 year old man!!! I couldn't believe my eyes and thought that had to be a misprint.

I guess if those two can tie the knot, a 52 and 30 y o can, too.

I'd pick a fit, muscular younger guy any day, as opposed to a flabby old old geezer.

Lets calculate.
A boy born in a poor family can have a reasonable house in about 20-30 years if he works hard and if he is tight hand enough about money to be able to have a house. So, he will be single till about 40 years old. When he has a house finally, he may look around to marry a woman. It won't be easy for him to find a girl close to his age as girls usually marry when they are between 20-25 years old. So, automatically, there will be age difference of 15-20 years. Add a year or two to his age if she also wants a car beside house as he has to work for a year or two to be able to have a car. So, a man born in a poor family are automatically disqualified by this economy system or if you still somehow marry, you will be seen as strange by the community due to such relatively big age gap. Some mention love, but, I don't know what it is.

Let me guess... it consisted of one page....all question marks..??????????????

You 'guess' what you have in your mind..? Strange.

Nothing should stand in the way of love, but if you're dating someone older than your parents then it is, i dunno, a bit wrong? Ok so love has no limits i fully understand, but i'm sure you can see why people thrown upon this kinda thing, especially if it shows. I personally have no problem with couples like that as long as they are happy and get on despite the age (sometimes even a generation) gap. It's probably best if the older person is young at heart and the younger is *mature* ;)

Sure! (Let me counter-balance a little?)


You know, houses are far more expensive in Holland, but if a poor guy meets a poor girl and they both have a job, they're definitely able to rent or even buy a decent house almost straight away. (Unless they feel like saving up a little money for furniture first!)


If he believes your story applies to everyone, that is.


We have about four million singles in my country, which means that most younger people don't feel like marrying. Oh, and there's another flaw in your theory: Just ask around on this forum, because I'm pretty damn sure that most women who chose for a career are, or have been single during their thirties.


Automatically? I beg to differ.


Consider this: Most younger people move to the bigger cities, and most people who live in the bigger cities don't have, or even want a car. (Nor do they really need one!)


If you live in some backwater town maybe, but otherwise, I tend to disagree if I just look around me. Most people these days are pretty relaxed about such things, and I suspect the younger generations will care even less about someone else's choice of partners. As it should be. I mean, it's your life and no one else's, and you're the one who actually has to live with the person.


Unless your mom was 13 when she had you! I think age differences ranging from 10 to 15 years don't matter too much, wether the man is older or the woman is.


I think you're right about that, but there *is* something else which makes sense. Women are at their sexual peak somewhere between the age of 35 to 45, while men are at their sexual peak somewhere between the age of 25 to 35, so when it comes to sexuality it's actually not a bad idea.

my friend is 38 and her husband is 27, she told me the same thing lol... i've never been attracted to older men or young boys so i shall stick to 'my' age range ;)

No, I don't know. I am in another world. Poor guy having a gf? having a decent job? that will help him buy even a decent house straight away? How possible? Heard mortgage. By that way?


Some follow what Pope says, some follow what Pope does. (What does Pope follow?)

I am aware of younger generation anywhere in the world is staying away "marriage", perhaps, due to its perceive of marriage as religious concept, sacred-ized especially after these Abraham religions. Guess why, why an already existing institution was declared as God-ish thing suddenly by these religions. Not much different than Pagan calendar start (December 20-25) accepted as the birth of Christ. Forgotten things. Anyway, there was marriage even before religions. In Turkish, marriage means "evlenmek", literally means "having house or housing." So, I take marriage as something like housing. Unfortunately, I am not a pigeon who will not be asked for any house by female pigeon when flirting. (after flirt, pigeons make their house/nest together). Female humans are conditioning "I have to have a house at least first." This is no problem, but, guys born in poor families will have to work for 20-30 years to have a house, hence, automatically 15-20 years age difference between majority of single girls and such a man with age over 40. Sure, there must be rare girls who are still single in their 40s. They already have paid the cost of this economy system of, physically healthy, but, mentally spastics.

Well, she's right! (Of course there's nothing wrong with your own age range!) Never? Not even when they're millionaires and kind of handsome-ish? Think Daniel Craig or something? (James Bond.) No?


Ah. Okay, I'll try to explain it to you then. (But only because I've got nothing better to do at the moment!)


I wouldn't say decent, but you should keep in mind that about 40% of the European population works for minimum wage.


If he has to buy it alone he can't. If he has a girlfriend who also has a job they might find a pretty decent house. (Not too big or anything!) Especially in the less popular, rural areas. Of course you also have the option of renting a house here, so you don't always have to secure a contract.


Yes. Loans, mortgages or just renting.


Young people chat a lot, and read a lot, and wise up about relationship stuff a little faster than previous generations. That's one. There are a lot more people on today's planet than in the past, so of course we can't continue this traditional ideal of marrying and having huge families of our own. That's two. Of course women are allowed an education, and can work for themselves now, so the need for an institutional marriage for security reasons became less important. That's three.


Says who? I know plenty of single women who live on their own! (And they would probably welcome a boyfriend in *their* homes.)


Nope. In most cases, you need to pay a surety, or two or three months rent in advance and you'll have a place of your own. It may take people a while to apply for a place though, because there are long waiting lists in some cities and towns.


Not so rare, really. The divorce rate in Holland was 38.7% in 2007, and I suspect it's higher today. And that's from all the people who marry, because a lot of the younger people just decide to try and live together these days, and quite a few of them sign some sort of a contract with eachother, although it's not the same arrangement as a marriage. But I think it's better this way. Times have changed, situations have changed, people have changed, the mentality has changed, so I guess there are a couple of traditions which just have to change. That's not a bad thing.

Sure, we have the internet now. But, basical things have not changed really. (See other topic, girls still making make-ups as in old days. Why do they have to do that? Men need to question themselves.)

You mentioning Holland, probably as an example of an highly developed country of today world, right? I guess Sweden is not much different. (but, still, they are about same old thing, sexual abuse, etc.)

Yes, we hear higher divorce rates, etc more in Western Europe in particular and in developed West in general. We also hear higher rate of different sexual orientations such as transsexuals, etc etc. You think these are changes? No, we just hear voices from richer communities more. History does not tell about poorer communities. We can hear the history of richer communities too similarly today. Eg, Hermaphrodite, a god in rich Greek period. A voice coming from tousands of years ago. Higher divorce rates, prostitution, polygamy (in different forms), different sexual orientations which some call degeneration/deformation, etc are not a new thing, such sexual liberalism etc have always been openly known in rich communities throughout the history, not a new thing, hence, we hear their history of riches only as they talk about their problems only. Today, technology is developed? Yes. Even a poor from far part of the world can communicate with a rich from another part of the world. But, I see there is still old problem. We still see house crisis as it has happened zillions of times throughout the human history. There is nothing to be done by a poor.

There are plenty of basic things which have changed though. (Or do you still hunt Mammoths with a spear?) I guess most girls actually like their make-up, and enjoy their private moments of taking care of themselves.


I'm not arrogant, although I might pose, boast and joke about my own country sometimes, but that's not always serious. I'm pretty happy to live here most of the time, we still have reasonably low crime rates, and there's not too much violence. I disagree about the direction in which some politicians are trying to take us, but apart from all of that I'm proud of our country, our big mouths, our mentality and our way of dealing with things. I'm well aware of the fact that Holland used to be one of the most conservative countries in Europe in the past though!


Unfortunately, violence, hatred, abuse and sexual abuse occurs in all countries, with no exceptions, which is why we shouldn't sweep those subjects under the rug and pretend it's not happening. I think the more open a society gets though, the lesser we'll see of this ugly behavior. So that's a good thing about trying to be a transparant, progressive and open-minded society, instead of being an overly proud nation who can't deal with the truth because it might ''shame them'' in any way. I mean, whatever horrible things someone else does, it's not my shame to bear, but I won't look the other way if I can help it.


Yes, and I've mentioned the main reasons for that, which isn't necessarily a negative thing given the circumstances. Or do you think we should go back to our old ways, and overpopulate the whole world, and start even more wars because we're running out of resources and living space? Being single or having no children isn't necessarily a negative thing. (You have freedom.)


No I don't, because I know that people who have different sexual orientations have always existed, for as long as humanity has. Before Christianity came to Europe, people viewed this behavior as socially acceptable.


Which isn't necessarily a bad thing in general.


You couldn't be more wrong. If you look at history, you'll see that it's actually poor people who have changed a lot, for better and worse. Napoleon Bonaparte was nothing more than a Corporal. Vladimir Putin came from an extremely poor family, and even had to eat rats for dinner sometimes. Lech Wałęsa was a simple Electrician who decided he had it with the way things were going. Barack Obama was the son of an immigrant, who left his family and went back to Kenia. (Just to mention a few people!) Sure, political figures are sometimes nothing more than a puppet to their richer manipulators/sponsors/masters, but they do change a lot of things, and not always in the way that the elite wants them to. Take Adolf Hitler for example, he failed his education miserably, and had even been homeless for periods of time. Not exactly someone you would expect to end up as one of the worst dictators in European history, would you? So if there's one thing we can learn from our history, it's that we should never underestimate anyone just because they're poor or unsuccesful.

But let's not deviate too much from the topic, shall we? (I'm afraid none of this has anything to do with age differences in relationships!)

Crime rate is higher in poorer countries than richer countries? Probably so as expected. Hungry people have to steal the bread as their resources are taken by richer communities. (Do I need to mention Dutch colonies too?) So, crimes by richer communities are usually done globally, out of their own countries. In return, deformations/degenerations especially in sexual things occur in richer communities. Poorer communities are busier with more serious problem, hunger. while richer communities have obese problem. This is reflected in relationships too (just look at the picture of fat guy and thing gal in other thread.)

Some guys born in poor families, you gave examples, might have become successfulls and powers later in their lifes. But, humans change and forget things in their pasts. I'll give a better example: G. Soros. He was a poor kid. Now, 15th richest guy of the world. You know his "open society" community. He does some philanthropy works as well as giving financial support to LGBT communities around the world.

Anyway. Relation between rich and poor is like that. There is meal on the table. If one eats meals of other person too, he becomes obese and other person becomes hunger. Obese causes life problem to other person while he causes health problem to himself which may also result in sexual problems in himself.

Age difference has nothing to do with poorness and richness? Strictly related, in this economy system of the world in which love relations are like doctor-patience, teacher-student, etc in all that money is involved. Age difference is important between a prostitute and a client? This is such an economy system in the world in which love can not be lived.

That's right, and there's not always *that* much the average individual can do about that, but let's not forget there are also influential groups of elites who actually have more positive views, and that those groups actually *do* want to change things for the better? (So it's not like all hope is lost!) It starts with how we treat eachother at the bottom. If we somehow manage to get a little bit smarter and a little bit more educated as a collective about such things, or atleast more aware of our surroundings and get a little more involved, then many good things may come of that, although I suppose it will never be perfect.


I'm sure it has something to do with it in some cases, but definitely not always, no. I'm sure you know that most people choose someone from their own social sphere. I guess some women who belong to working-class are a bit luckier than guys when it comes to ''dating up'', but I think women are starting to realise they can have a younger guy too, just like men can have a younger girl. Everybody happy, right? Hey, whatever you may think of it, it sure beats loneliness?


That's what you say. I'm definitely saying something else. If you can't or refuse to believe in love, then you won't find it. There are plenty people who do find love with someone else, but let's be realistic about it, love doesn't always last. It's sad sometimes, but it doesn't always have to be such a big drama? (Just be thankful for all those moments when you do find some warmth!) I'm sure your mother loved you. I'm sure your father loved you. I'm sure someone loved you. Love doesn't always have to be a man-woman relationship you know! But to say you can't live it? That's a bridge too far for me.

:)

Copying & pasting this picture posted in the other thread here

Everybody happy here?
Guy is probably feeling heavy, fat, health problem.
Gal is probably counting the hours she has to pass with him.
Who else? Ha, there is photographer who took this picture. Guess, he is her pimp who is counting money who will take from his gf. Is he too happy?

If you saying everybodys happy in this picture, then, I have nothing else to say. Keep this economy system then. And, keep visa to your happy countries. (stay away from me. I have teeth behind my lips.)

Very likely. (But I guess you can't fathom that much.)


One of my close friends is also a heavy fellow. He seems happy enough though, and he's a forklift driver at a small factory. (Also has a slim, shorter and nice looking girlfriend.) I know they're happy too, so why shouldn't this couple be?


Really? Can you read her mind now? What if this guy is extremely sweet and knows how to please her? What if she sees something in him that you don't see? Huh? Ever thought about that? You sound like someone who believes that it's only the money that counts. I wonder who the Capitalist is here? (Not me!)


For all you know it's her mom or her girlfriend who took that picture. Did you see these two people kissing by the way? (Who says they're a couple?)


Maybe you should ask her? Did you even read what JustysiaS posted about her friend and her younger husband? I'm willing to bet they're happy with eachother. Oh, and what about Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore? (Think about it!) They're both filthy rich, so they can't have picked eachother for the money..


Hey, I'm just replying to your questions buddy, so you know what to do if what I say bothers you. You can start a thread about our whole society and system in another thread if you like, because this one is about age differences in relationships. (Not about pimps, crime, abuse and economics or whatever you wish to bring into this.)