6 months with my Polish girlfriend and I still don't understand her..

What makes you think that Huegel?

Look - this is genuine. I did NOT make those posts. I am also in the process of cleaning up two other forums where the person concerned was a little less reserved. There will be no job offers coming through because nothing was done. The person does not know the senior partner - I DO. I posted here to let you know that.

Oh and by the way having my picture on the internet was not just unpleasant it had the chance of affecting the security of my family. Check it out - admin has removed my photo.

I just wanted you to know that nothing is going to happen.

Hi everyone,

well, might as well come clean, there's no good pretending that things are okay.

My situation finally came to a conclusion a couple of weeks ago, two days after I came back from Poland.

As you may have all read, things weren't a bed of roses during the last few months for me anyway, but I thought with a bit of hardwork, we could have worked things out, me going out more frequent to build on the relationship.

I went out about three weeks ago, womens day was on the Thursday, so I thought I would include that in my trip to see her. Perhaps there were signs then, I had been there nearly a week before she met up with me. Bottom line is we met on the Wednesday and Thursday, I gave her gifts and a pink tullip for womens day, we sat in the park, she opened the gifts we talked, smiled, laughed and joked, i thought things were going okay. Later that day she left, she kissed me goodbye, not the visit I had planned but we spent time together. I even got invited back out for her birthday.

Got back to the UK, and over the course of a few days, learnt that she had decided to give things another go with an ex boyfriend from a few years ago - talk about kick in the teeth. This wasn't a one day decision, they must have talked about this for some time, sorting out their previous differences etc.

We spoke on the phone, she cried, she probably didn't think I would be as calm as I was, she said she wanted to keep contact. I asked if the language was an issue, apparently it wasn't, but I think in a way it was, although from a Polish background, I wasn't born and raised there, so maybe I didn't have a proper understanding of the lifestyle and culture - I don't know?

I can't help think, if I had done things differently would everything be different now? Perhaps I was not good enough for her, a million things go through my head everyday.
Over the last two weeks, we have had contact a bit, text message here, 2 min phone call there, but generally contact is getting less.

It seems everything we ever did together, places we went, the good times we had, don't mean a thing to her now, I can't understand it! I was never bad to her, all i ever tried to be was good.

I am going back to Poland next week for Easter to see family, and thought about heading off to meet her for the day, like she said we could-as friends. But perhaps I am prolonging the pain, maybe what we shared together, will make it impossible for us to be friends I don't know?

im sorry to hear that Sparky.

<HUG> but best to leave her alone. If you want to be more than friends, you cannot 'be' friends.

Once that threshold is past. Its past!

its hard, its cruel but if you WANT to be friends and leave it at that - cool

Yeah, I know what you're saying daffy. I did say we could be friends for now, but whether it would be good in the future, I don't know, especially when she gets engaged, married, pregnant - that will hurt, but not as much if I meet someone else in that time.

do you seriously think when a girl say that can we just be friends ( after a relationship) and the guys says yeah sure y not. got to break the ice and say sorry mate that can never be possible. never happened and never will. that just the way it goes. go with what Daffy said. let it go. its better to leave now then later. cos then the pain will be hard to handle.

Yeah, I know RazZ, it's just going to be hard to let go for a while, but I know I have to, she has moved on without a care in the world. I tried calling her like she told me to for a chat, but straight to voicemail, maybe thats a clue to how she feels now?

Thanks 4 the advice RazZ

Sparky, maybe you should admit you are an *******. Polish girls are fabulous.

Maybe you are the a*s*s*hole.....obviously Sparky thinks his girl if fabulous, otherwise he wouldn't be feeling as bad as he does.

Polish girls definetely are, but a majority of them are also insane (in good and bad ways) as well

Thanks Ranj,

Yeah i feel bad, empty, lost, things that were planned for her birthday, Easter and other events are gone, just like that!

Yo Sparky, how long do you think you will keep on doing this to yourself. if you are in poland, i suggest that you take some time off to go and enjoy the view or go to clubs and try to get a date, it might take your mind off ( Easier said then done) but do try it.

P.S easy on the drinking. it will take your mind in her direction. ( which you dont want ) go out and do something wild.( dont get caught by the police though )

Thats one thing I haven't done, is drown my sorrows, I have avoided drinking, because like you say, the mind will think about her.

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.
Thich Nhat Hanh

Listen to RazZ and Daffy they know what they're talking about! PEACE

Oh, I love him....very wise man

still i love that pingwin

its experience from the past. so yeah trying to help others learn from our mistakes. ( not the i recall it as a mistake)

hearing postive and realistic advice certainly helps.

thanks

just give her what u need to give her and you and her will be okay
speaking as a woman

Understandle, you've only read the first posting, as you read on, you will see things have concluded.

Understandable (sorry, spelt it wrong)