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Polish Girlfriend obsessive and not trusting


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posts: 59
 
whitecrow
  Jan 16, 08, 01:17  #1

Hi all my first post here so go easy on me im dyslexic as well so sorey any bad grammer or spelling.

Im english around 24 now had my girlfriend who polish for one year half i been to her village were she lives poland twice south krakow and going again soon.
I love her to bits she really sweet nice personality as well as really good looking much better then any english girl i had befor. She is younger me now 20.

But lately we had lot arguments reason is she is so obsessive she wants me do everything with her go everywere with her. Im not allowed out with other girls on my own or clubing or with friends. If i go shoping or she go shoping we got go with each other not seprate or apart. I got 7 polish friends in england moment and more in poland now and when i ask they seem say it's polish culture and all polish women like this when married etc. Some them even fought omfg when my mum went out to restaraunt with friends on her own with out my dad and said what she doing thats not allowed she should be with your dad.
I was like what ??? you not allowed enjoy going out yourself on own when married or something in poland.

I know polish culture can be differnt depending which area poland you from like when i learn polish some words totaly differnt in other parts poland and i talk polish to friend north she not understand some words i say i don't understand some she says.

I was just woundering is this like the norm is polish girls very obsessive there boyfriend husband all time ringing them everyday checking up on them wanting go everywere with them not giveing them much space go out enjoy themself on there own.

She wants me move in with her now and even talking about babies and stuff and which country live in or how long we stay work england. I know she loves me very much and i lover her loads but it's almost like i got stalker sometimes not girlfriend.

Can anyone give me advice on your culture in marriage and when going out whats exspected of the boy. Just becuse if i hear one more time thats not how polish boy would do it hang myself or thats not what your suppose do you should bring me flowers after argument each time.

Just anoying and if i say her your treating me like slave not boyfriend she say oh you english you don't know how treat girl you should do everything for me. so what all polish boys are like slaves and arnt allowed enjoy them selfs and do everything for girl??

I don't know i really need help subject. It's not big relgion thing she may be catholic and im church of england but my dad catholic and thats fine and church england simlar to catholic anyway just broke way years go when had argument history etc.

Im just getting ****ed of iffer men are like slaves in poland to women and women rule the roost in every house and polish men very week to them? or is my girlfriend like taken the **** but how much whats the rules i don't know help please.

we both liveing and working england moment she has friends and familey in england working as well. I have polish friends i worked with befor i even seen her and learnt some polish befor i was with her.

oh and she dosent like me drinking hmmm helpppppppp

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z_darius
  Jan 16, 08, 01:34  #2

I can certainly understand how a girl, or a boy for that matter, would like to have some sort of exclusivity to the other "half". I might be on her side if you say you want to go out with other girls on your own. Why have a girl friend if it is so important to you to spend time with other girls? Why not settle for jst the other girls?

Still, reading the other parts of your post, I think you got yourself a a chick who is pretty controlling even by Polish standards. (Notice that I didn't use the phrase "control freak" out of courtesy ;)

Clearly, the two of you have different approaches to relationships in general. I think that this relationship has a very good chance to explode to bits and pieces. Let it happen before she talks you into having a baby.

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krysia
  Jan 16, 08, 01:38  #3

No, not all Polish women are like that. But I know some Polish men who are very controlling and get upset if gf even says hi to another guy.
But generally, that's how they think in Poland. If you're with someone, you shouldn't have friends of opposite sex. You should be doing things together, only have eyes for each other, shouldn't go out to lunch with anybody else etc. Relationships become like prisons. You have to be your own individual self, but some people become so dependent on the other person that they can't function without them.
You need to have some free time, she needs to learn to let you go and do things with your friends otherwise you guys won't last long. You will be unhappy.

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whitecrow
  Jan 16, 08, 02:24  #4

Cheers for advice so far seems so hard i still don't understand why it's so bad to be able to have free space and go out with other girls. i have a sister she got friends who my friends i got old girls i used work with still friends why shouldent i be able meet up for chat for old time sakes i don't understand it's just like there is no trust.

I thinck there is real big differnce between england and poland in fact poland is still far behind in england in realtionships and brakeing away from there relgion more and becomeing more free and independant. I thinck my gf wants handcuff me to her sometimes and not let go.

but just not meeting with other girls it's boys as well which i don't understand she thinck i gone turn gay and leave her or something.

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lonely
  Jan 16, 08, 02:43  #5

whitecrow wrote:
I thinck my gf wants handcuff me to her sometimes


And you're complaining???? lol

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Wyspianska
Edited by: Wyspianska  Jan 16, 08, 04:42  #6

I'm Polish and in fact had the same problem with my ex bf. He was freaking jealous, calling me 10 times per day when we were apart (he was on sport camp for week or so). I'm not an easy person, esp not easy to control, so of course i was partying and all sh*it he didn't know about. I never was cheating him though. It's just about free space which i need and an insupportable situation which he created! Such relationship isn't worth continuation in my opinion so that's why i broke up with him. Sometimes i miss him and it's nothing bad, since I'm a single now. But i don't regret my decision. Life with such person is so tiring and disturbed!

So now you have an example that not all polish girls are so obsessive. I'm not. Even an opposite.

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southern
  Jan 16, 08, 05:14  #7

You can use a chastity belt and give her the keys.

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Seanus
  Jan 16, 08, 05:33  #8

Don't worry too much!! She should respect ur side too. I see it as a sign of love when she wants to get closer. I dunno why but women find it easy to get close to me. Remember, she is in a foreign country and, perhaps more than b4, needs to feel safe and secure. Having a foreign partner can really help u settle and make all necessary adjustments. A relationship is hard work and u have to see where she is coming from too. Don't assume that religion controls many Polish girls to such a high level. Like us, they are more concerned about completing their courses, meeting deadlines etc etc. It's the family dimension that may present the problem. I've been lucky in that, while my girl's parents respect the church, they are not avid followers and don't feel bound like others do. They are great people and we see eye to eye on most things. My advice is, make her feel comfortable (like a home from home) but be clear about ur intentions. Polish women (and Poles generally) like u being direct and telling them straight up, they are tough people and aren't as easily offended as Asians let's say. Be a man and state ur case with tact whitecrow

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Wyspianska
  Jan 16, 08, 08:06  #9

Seanus wrote:
I see it as a sign of love when she wants to get closer.

a blind love without trust. Just like it was in my previous relationship which i wrote before about.

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Seanus
  Jan 16, 08, 09:42  #10

I know, I was just trying to be positive. It's so important to be cautious and not commit too easily these days. That applies across the board

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Doba
  Jan 16, 08, 09:44  #11

work of advice.. do not trust a Polish woman.. Ive learned the hard way

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shewolf
  Jan 16, 08, 12:45  #12

whitecrow wrote:
I know she loves me very much and i lover her loads but it's almost like i got stalker sometimes not girlfriend.


It sounds like she's using you to fill some sort of void inside. Most people don't depend so much on someone else for happiness. I don't think it's a cultural thing.

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krysia
  Jan 16, 08, 13:22  #13

Doba wrote:
work of advice.. do not trust a Polish woman.. Ive learned the hard way

So what happened?

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Doba
  Jan 16, 08, 13:26  #14

In short Im positive she cheated, she denies it but i know better, long distance relationships.. dumbest thing ever lol

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Wyspianska
  Jan 16, 08, 13:27  #15

Doba wrote:
long distance relationships

.... not good to hear

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Doba
  Jan 16, 08, 13:29  #16

eh who really cares, it was doomed from the get go... never again thats the sad truth about those long dist....

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polishgirltx [Guest]
  Jan 16, 08, 19:54  #17

whitecrow, maybe your gf has some trust issues from the past and she doesn't know how to deal with that... i think you should talk about that... tell her what you told us and you'll see what will be her response...
good luck...

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shewolf
  Jan 16, 08, 20:28  #18

whitecrow wrote:
I got 7 polish friends in england moment and more in poland now and when i ask they seem say it's polish culture and all polish women like this when married etc.


Did they say this from personal experience?

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Michal
  Jan 17, 08, 11:55  #19

whitecrow wrote:
I know polish culture can be differnt depending which area poland you from like when i learn polish some words totaly differnt in other parts poland and i talk polish to friend north she not understand some words i say i don't understand so

This is very typical of Eastern Europe in general. I think it is partly a Polish 'thing', partly because of the Roman Catholic Church and partly genetic. As women grow older they become even worse! There is something in the genes makes women become increasingly more 'difficult' as they grow older-they think that everything is theirs and that they are responsible for everything, even the spinning motion of the planet earth in the middle of the night! Some women can be really very nasty. The Roman Catholic church is evil and it is understandable why the Russians hate not only Poland but Catholisism in general. The great Russian writer, Dostoyewsky HATED them! Do not have a baby with this woman, I think she is using you to show off or get even with a previous partner in her home village. I do know Polish women very well, you only have to read some of their posts on this Forum to see what they can be like. Be very careful indeed. Love is blind and you are in love but go away for a while and then come back. You will see her for what she really is. More to the point, look at her mother and realize that in twenty years from now, she will look just like her! Pretty scary, yeah?!

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Oscypek
  Jan 17, 08, 14:27  #20

whitecrow wrote:
I was just woundering is this like the norm is polish girls very obsessive there boyfriend husband all time


It's known that Polish women like a LOT of attention. So, yes (to varying degrees).

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JustysiaS
Edited by: JustysiaS  Jan 17, 08, 14:53  #21

Michal wrote:
Michal


oh yes, here is the expert of the Eastern-European culture again, whos now an expert on women as well. you are nasty about Poland, you are nasty about Polish people and now youre nasty about the Roman Catholic church. youre just a nasty old sh*t who always moans and never has anything positive to say. Just because you worship the plastic dwarf in your garden doesnt mean you are better than the Roman Catholics. you are so stupid that you even mention the existence of a 'nasty gene' or a 'lesbian gene', just shows on what level you are.

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Dice
  Jan 17, 08, 15:13  #22

One thing comes to mind talking about Polish women; absolute lack of any trace of logic.
The best way to describe them is this: nice to look at and impossible to live with. And that's only true with the younger girls, older women are ugly as hell and really ******. I hope I wasn't to indirect in my description.

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szarlotka
  Jan 17, 08, 15:18  #23

Dice wrote:
older women are ugly as hell and really ******.


Funny that, my wife of 25 years still has just about the sexiest bum on planet Earth. Perhaps I just got lucky or maybe living in Engalnd has preserved her in some sort of way. LOL

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southern
  Jan 17, 08, 16:16  #24

Dice wrote:
about Polish women; absolute lack of any trace of logic.


Generally slavic women do not seem reasonable in westerners' eyes but this is part of the charm.

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JustysiaS
Edited by: JustysiaS  Jan 17, 08, 16:31  #25

Dice wrote:
One thing comes to mind talking about Polish women; absolute lack of any trace of logic.
The best way to describe them is this: nice to look at and impossible to live with. And that's only true with the younger girls, older women are ugly as hell and really ******. I hope I wasn't to indirect in my description.


youre really harsh about Polish women, all girls Polish or not have their moments as theyve got hormones running through their bodies that you dont. and since they are abroad its sometimes hard to express what they feel and they get hysterical and frustrated. trying to understand, being patient and supportive helps a lot in a long run. it is, like southern said, a matter of cultural difference.

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miranda
  Jan 17, 08, 16:34  #26

Dice wrote:
One thing comes to mind talking about Polish women; absolute lack of any trace of logic.

sorry that has been your experiance but it seems to be an isolated one, since you are talking about one woman, or are you talking about more than one;)

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osiol
  Jan 17, 08, 17:18  #27

JustysiaS wrote:
theyve got hormones running through their bodies that you dont

and vice versa, we assume.

JustysiaS wrote:
they get hysterical

Swooning ladies. Bring the smelling salts - sounds like a Victorian novella.

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the_falkster
  Jan 17, 08, 19:43  #28

sounds to me like quite a few male users on here got dumped by a polish girl and therefor try to describe them in a bad way in two sentences...

what springs to mind
- no character can be described in only two sentences, apart from those people who are just 'plain stupid', there even two words are enough)
- you guys must be some real men, if you can't handle a girl (or any other being with a bit of character...)

think of the following (just my own experience)... if all polish women are after your money and you think they look so sexy (up to a certain age, of course...) than get the best out of it. treat her well at the beginning and pay for everything. than gradually pay less and less... you'll see what will happen. she might run away which is good because obviously it wasn't worth it anyway. or she gives you a lot of attention to make you pay again which is good because everyone wants attention.
you see you can't loose...

but still you hear a of frickin moaners on here who can't just tell the truth... there seems to be a quality about these girls, and it looks like you moaners just miss your exes... bitter...

i also don't think that these girls are only sexy until there mid twenties. girls in their thirties know a lot better what they want and are far more confident and conscious about themselves... now that is what i call sexy!
to complain about a girls' looks is quite funny. us men only need to look into a mirror to realise that most of us are not really becoming particularly handsome when we develop bellies and loose our hair... ;-)

and by the way...
above characteristics are more or less strong not only with polish women but with all women... that is what made tehm attractive to cavemen already... ;-)

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miranda
Edited by: miranda  Jan 17, 08, 20:00  #29

the_falkster wrote:
bitter...

yes and I agree with the rest of your post. Thank God for men like you:)

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lonely
  Jan 18, 08, 03:13  #30

the_falkster wrote:
loose our hair


Are you talking about me? lol

A well written posting and I couldn't agree with you more.

Now, all you whingers... dry your eyes :o)

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