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Domestic arguments caused by differences between Polish and English culture


spiritus 69 | 651
10 Nov 2012 #1
My lovely Polish wife is wonderful but occasionally, without warning, will throw a curve ball at me which makes me challenge something that I have believed in my whole life.

Argument #1. A few days after moving in together we were having a meal and she said "why have you put the salt in the wrong cellar (pot) " ? I thought about this for a few moments before answering "huh" ? So she moves on to elaborate with her point being that "in Poland" and "everyone she has EVER met" "always" puts the salt in the cellar pot with multiple holes and the pepper goes in the cellar pot with only one hole.

Now until that time I hadn't put much thought into it and don't specifically remember the day that I learnt that particular life lesson but I was pretty sure the salt goes in the one holed cellar pot and the pepper goes in the multiple holed pot for no other reason then it just felt right when I was shaking it over my dinner ! So we both took a step back and a Mexican stand off ensued over this thorny topic with the salt continuing to be in the correct one holed pot and my beloved wife tolerating my obvious faux pas.

Her argument strengthened when in Poland at a large family and friend gathering the question was raised (by her) about the salt and pepper cellars. The unanimous answer was that my wife was correct in that the salt goes in the multi holed pot as you use more salt than pepper. My own certainty has continued to waver ever since and I feel I am slowly being brain washed and so welcome the wisdom of people who are either Polish or who live in Poland and whom therefore can give an informed opinion on this topic.
Wroclaw 44 | 5,379
10 Nov 2012 #2
from wikipedia: "Salt shakers will normally have fewer holes in them than pepper shakers."

just look at google images. some shakers have the same amount of holes for salt and pepper.

some folk use a pepper grinder.
Ironside 53 | 12,366
10 Nov 2012 #3
eh? Are you serious? The best way to avoid domestic arguments is not getting into arguments over unimportant details which tents to rattle women so much.

phew!?
Magdalena 3 | 1,837
11 Nov 2012 #4
salt goes in the multi holed pot as you use more salt than pepper.

"Culture"? Seriously? ;-p
pgtx 29 | 3,146
11 Nov 2012 #5
She was right about the salt holes. But it's such a silly thing to argue about. And even more silly is to make it a cultural difference, lol.

I wonder what else you're arguing about :)
mafketis 36 | 10,708
11 Nov 2012 #6
The best way to handle domestic arguments: As soon as you realize you're right, apologize profusely.

Google graphic is inconclusive. Though at least one graphic has pepper in the shaker with fewer holes.

For myself I'd never use a pepper shaker, only a grinder so the question is moot. Were I forced to use a pepper shaker I'd put pepper in the shaker with fewer holes because salt is more likely to clog (especially in a damp climate like the kind I grew up in) so you'd want more holes for it. Pepper needs fewer holes because it doesn't clog as much.
SeanBM 35 | 5,806
11 Nov 2012 #7
I thought salt went into the shaker with one hole because of it's historical value and it's not good for you.

only a grinder

I rarely use salt but when I do it's sea salt from a grinder, I've been led to believe it's less processed.

All that being said I remember coming back to Dublin from my travels, made it into town, spent the last of my money in a sit down fish and shipper, threw on the salt only to find out it was sugar.

My own certainty has continued to waver ever since and I feel I am slowly being brain washed and so welcome the wisdom of people who are either Polish or who live in Poland and whom therefore can give an informed opinion on this topic.

People from different countries do things differently, there is no right or wrong, until you are married :)

I find the food here in Poland too salty and eating out everywhere but I don't use salt.

Argument #1.

Sounds like there's gonna be more...

Which way does the toilet paper hang on the holder?

Toilet seat up or down?

Tap water or bottled?

Water or juice?
ShawnH 8 | 1,497
11 Nov 2012 #8
Over the top.

Down, for hygene and aesthetic reasons

Tap (at home) for economic reasons, and the water is good. Bottled elsewhere for plumbing reasons....

Water. Too much sugar in the diet. I do however get a sweet tooth on occasion.

The answers provided above have been approved by my wife.
delphiandomine 88 | 18,163
11 Nov 2012 #9
I find the food here in Poland too salty and eating out everywhere but I don't use salt.

Me too - the culture of piling salt into everything really turns me off at times. If I've used a pile of spices on food, there really is no reason to add salt!
SeanBM 35 | 5,806
11 Nov 2012 #10
Over the top.

I didn't get it at first but over the top. I see:

(bit slow today)

xdvfzsd

For less waste I always go under the bottom (why does that sound rude? toilet humour...)

Down, for hygene and aesthetic reasons

The seat now, not the full on lid, that has always been my piece de la resistance when in a monthly argument, out of nowhere ;) why I didn't leave the toilet seat down when finished, to which I would say why don't you ever lift the seat up.

No longer an issue.
But I must agree, the lid should be down, your wife is very wise.

Tap (at home) for economic reasons, and the water is good. Bottled elsewhere for plumbing reasons....

Polish people, for reasons I have not ascertained, seem to think tap water is poison.
There's nothing wrong with Krakow's water until you ask for it and the looks of bewilderment make you feel like this will be the last thing you ever do.

Water. Too much sugar in the diet. I do however get a sweet tooth on occasion.

As the water is obviously poisoned ;) most homes I go to offer juice or tea lemon and sugar no milk not that it'd be strong enough for milk or coffee, which could be Turkish coffee, leaving the crap in the cup to give you something to wince about.

The answers provided above have been approved by my wife.

That's really when all these so called 'cultural differences' are just a fart in the wind :)

If I've used a pile of spices on food,

There's that really popular coloured salt, can't think of the name, they even colour it too look like vegetables so you think you're doing yourself a favour... :)
rozumiemnic 8 | 3,861
11 Nov 2012 #11
OMG salt salt salt -
when I used to cook for my dear husband he would shout SALT SALT THERE's NOT ENOUGH SALT!!!!
so i would point out the salt cellar on the table (with one hole yes..)
(was cooking for babies too so no salt in the food right?)
and he would add some salt grudgingly as tho I was trying to poison him...and shout SaLT SALT there's not enough SALT!!!
divorced now I might add.
OP spiritus 69 | 651
11 Nov 2012 #12
At least some of you cottoned on to the fact that my post was slightly tongue in cheek. To the rest of you, where is your sense of humour ???

As for salt-why is it lavished on so many Polish meals ???
Magdalena 3 | 1,837
11 Nov 2012 #13
Because it makes food taste better and it's good for you as well ;-)
You wouldn't survive long without salt in your diet.
jon357 74 | 21,782
11 Nov 2012 #14
Because it makes food taste better

Because it increases the flavour of a bland diet!

and it's good for you as well ;-)

Salt????

You wouldn't survive long without salt in your diet.

Most people get more salt than they actually need from eating cheese or any processed food occasionally.
Wroclaw Boy
11 Nov 2012 #15
Because it makes food taste better and it's good for you as well

the dead sea is called that because it contains so much salt, nothing lives there, salt is a natural anibiotic. Too much of it makes your skin excessively rinkly over time.

Like most things - ok in moderation.

i always put the salt in the one whole pot, with some grains of raw rice to prevent moisture.
delphiandomine 88 | 18,163
11 Nov 2012 #16
Because it makes food taste better

But I know how to use other spices, salt is pretty much rendered irrelevant with my skills ;)

Because it increases the flavour of a bland diet!

Magdalena - you can probably answer this one - what was the general availability of spices in the PRL?
JustysiaS 13 | 2,239
11 Nov 2012 #17
I always thought that salt goes into the pot with more holes and pepper into the pot with one hole - because we use more salt than pepper.

My family are obsessed with salt, they sprinkle it on before they even taste the food. I try to avoid salt because it's unhealthy and if used in excess, it totally kills the flavour. A little bit of salt on fries, mashed potato, slice of tomato on a sandwich, popcorn (never tried sweet popcorn before I moved to the UK, I still find it weird lol) etc. is perfect, but not spoonfuls of it. Polish food is so nice but to someone who is not used to salty it might not taste so nice...
Magdalena 3 | 1,837
11 Nov 2012 #18
But I know how to use other spices, salt is pretty much rendered irrelevant with my skills ;)

I have eaten spicy unsalted food and didn't like it ;-)

what was the general availability of spices in the PRL?

You could get all the usual herbs like bay leaf, marjoram, allspice. But nothing very fancy or "exotic". Vegeta ruled - and it was usually quite difficult to get. I still have a thing for Vegeta ;-)

The saltiest food I have ever eaten was Japanese - cooked at home by a Japanese lady, mind you. Salty, but at the same time tasting of nothing much. Weird.
jon357 74 | 21,782
11 Nov 2012 #19
The saltiest food I've ever eaten was an 'award-winning' fish soup in Gdańsk. So salty I thought I was going to shrivel up like a slug. Nice though.
delphiandomine 88 | 18,163
11 Nov 2012 #20
You could get all the usual herbs like bay leaf, marjoram, allspice. But nothing very fancy or "exotic".

Aha! That makes much more sense now :)
SeanBM 35 | 5,806
11 Nov 2012 #21
There's that really popular coloured salt, can't think of the name, they even colour it too look like vegetables so you think you're doing yourself a favour... :)

Vegeta ruled - and it was usually quite difficult to get. I still have a thing for Vegeta ;-)

That's the stuff,

sadfzf
Magdalena 3 | 1,837
11 Nov 2012 #22
Interesting 'sales' technique :)

Not a sales technique, just a typical shortage. Vegeta was / is a Croatian product, if I remember rightly (Yugoslavian then), and it was quite easy to get e.g. in Czechoslovakia, but for some reason not in Poland.
RubasznyRumcajs 5 | 498
11 Nov 2012 #23
my (English) ex was giving me the crap for washing the plates in wrong way: instead of filling the sink/bowl with water and than wash the plates in their dirt (after all- if you wash couple of them water becomes dirty) I've washed them under the running water, in the proper way.

funny thing is, that she hated taking baths- she prefers showers (so do I)- because she saw no point of being in dirty water o.O
natasia 3 | 368
11 Nov 2012 #24
will throw a curve ball at me which makes me challenge something that I have believed in my whole life.

OMG I so completely relate to that. It is freaky when that happens. Like the shouts of horror and astonishment from my Polish other half and any of his family or friends when they see me wearing washing up gloves. That is apparently bordering on the insane, and certainly a point of amusement/embarrassment/derision for most ... I mean, wtf? Who is interested? Why can't I wear them? What is WRONG with it????

They actually say to me, spluttering with laughter and a kind of utter flabbergastedness: 'Why are you wearing those????'

Why do you think, you nitwits? So I don't burn my hands? So I don't have to touch dirty plates? Because I just had my nails done? Why NOT?
Magdalena 3 | 1,837
11 Nov 2012 #25
washing up gloves

As a Pole and frequent washer-upper, I see absolutely nothing strange in them. I use them, my dad uses them... since forever.
strzyga 2 | 993
12 Nov 2012 #26
A few days after moving in together we were having a meal and she said "why have you put the salt in the wrong cellar (pot) " ?

Get two sets of cellars, one for each of you, and then fill them according to your preferences. Sometimes that's the only way to go in married life.

As for salt-why is it lavished on so many Polish meals ???

Because we don't use the Worcester sauce.
delphiandomine 88 | 18,163
12 Nov 2012 #27
You should, it goes wonderfully with rosół :)
strzyga 2 | 993
12 Nov 2012 #28
I prefer fresh lovage :)
Magdalena 3 | 1,837
12 Nov 2012 #29
it goes wonderfully with rosół :)

Rosół is nothing without a pinch of nutmeg ;-)
natasia 3 | 368
12 Nov 2012 #30
As a Pole and frequent washer-upper, I see absolutely nothing strange in them. I use them, my dad uses them... since forever.

You don't know how glad I am to hear that!!! So it must be a regional and/or class issue, then, I guess ...


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