I'm pregnant of a polish guy

You need to talk with someone, who won't judge you. I don't understand why you are so concerned about this man's feelings, and you feel you aren't worthy of anything.

You are worth a lot! I personally don't care how this situation came about - it took two to tango - you didn't do it alone.

Right now, my concerns are about YOU. It matters not whether you decide to bring the pregnancy to fruition, or have an abortion. I won't think any different of you, no matter what.

You are scared and confused. You do not matter any less than this man, and you deserve to be happy! It shouldn't be a decision that he gets to be happy, and you toil away in misery.

Talk to your friends - who cares if they hate him, they are YOUR protectors! Talk to a therapist, talk to someone around you.

You are welcome to pm me, if you like. I wish only the best for you, and will think good, soothing thoughts for you amidst this chaos.

Hugs,

Julie

and there are plenty of stories that are opposite of the posts she quotes.

I agree totally

Read the first posted reply again.

You need to HONESTLY evaluate what kind of situation you could offer a child. Yes of course you would love your child, but you must think about the day to day needs and challenges that would be involved.

People like to imagine the summer without imagining the mosquitos if you know what I mean. You really have to choose the season that will be best for you to develop in.

What kind of support would you have for you and for the child? These are difficult questions that demand honest answers. I can only advocate choosing what's best for a child, sometimes that's to not be put in a crap situation but i don't know your situation.

If you do plan on keeping the child then this guy MUST be held responsible. You may want him to be happy but it sounds like he's happy to ruin lives and take no responsibility for his part.

My feelings are you shouldn't take on a responsibilty that you can't handle. Be honest with yourself in asking whether or not you can be a single mother, and for how long, and what your long term goals are.

Whatever you choose, be proud and you be your own judge, your life is your choices, the rest of us are just talkers. I wish you the best in your life.

Just goes to show you, men are men...good luck May do what makes you happy because as you have found out you are the only person you can count on !!! Like I always say, lifes too short for regrets, that's why I dont have them :) Be happy..

May, you still care for this guy. You might never see him again, but inside of you is this little treasure. You will have part of him with you forever and you will be very happy, because it is something beautiful you created. You are scared at the moment, but in 5 years when this child is walking and singing and laughing you will be so proud of it.
You will have something he will never have.

Thank you for your support, all of you are really fantastic.
Buziaczki.

---

Hi again,
Last night I could chat with him(I had to ask him to do it, he doesn't look worried at all). It's incredible, he said he'd support me(I know they were empty words), but that we didn't want to have a baby, so it's no sense to go on. And that he could be in contact with me until I solve the "problem". Moreover, when I asked him if his girlfriend knew it, he confessed not, and that he wasn't going to tell her. I cannot believe it, I feel so impotent, I cannot do anything at all, since they're in Galway(Ireland) while I'm in Spain, and although I tried to tell his girlfriend, I only know her name, nothing else.
I cannot believe he's behaving this way with me, he looked so sweet but he hides such a devil inside of him... I feel very deceived.

sorry May, you need to learn a lesson from this:
-make sure you know the man you are sleeping with first
-use protection when having sex, unless you are planning a family

good luck

hell yeah

someone old enough to legally have sex really shouldnt need telling this

who can't? really, haven't met a person that couldn't. wouldnn't? yes, definitely but anyone one can handle it.. it's done all over the place. some just do it much better then others but others really have no room to judge.

but they obviously do.. how many similar threads are on here?



yeah! well said.

yup... but as the old saying goes - if you take a dump in your bed, dont be suprised if you wake up smelling of poo

Rofl - I need to remember that one!

First of all, I thought I knew that man, but at the end I've seen he's got a double personality behind an angel face.
And we used protection, but something must failed. There are no 100% reliable contraceptive devices. Last year my former couple and me broke up, after a long relation that lasted for 13 years, and we never had any problem related to this. It must be that this guy is too fertile, that we were too constant, or just that fate wanted to laugh at me, I don´t know.

Hey, don't worry about the comments over why it happened, as that is irrelevant now. You are where you are and it's only how you proceed from here that matters now.

I wish you the best of luck :-)

This guy is a machine.

Maybe it was meant to be. You are not getting any younger May. One day when you're 70 years old you will be glad to have family around and if you remove this baby, you will always regret and wonder what this baby would look like.
And besides, when the guy is telling you to "take care of this problem" don't give him the satisfaction after him treating you this way.

May, it sounds like you just told him last week that he was going to be a father. Maybe he's in shock and he's not thinking straight. I don't know. But my advice is to just give it time. Someday he might want to see his child when he realizes what it really means.

plk 123 uh, nice job on making half a quote and taking it out of context, feel free to be less argumentative (needlessly) in the future. but you do make a good point regarding grammar; i most definitely should have included an "if" in that statement. my bad, but i get the impression you're trying to spin things a bit. shame on you.



you might want to examine the irony of that statement.

Right? Once you have one there is emotional scaring that you can never get rid of. trust me I work with patients that come in that have had abortions and the damage that is physical and emiotional is very hard to get rid of. For me it's wrong , it's not the childs fault that this happened. And yes this situation is very difficult, I truely feel for her. My friend had a baby on her own last yr and she wouldn't think twice about changing anything. She is 23 and her child will be 2 next yr feb. It can be the best thing that ever happens to her , and if you are surrounded by family and friends that love you and support you, you should have no problem raising a child. That child will love you till the end of time and thats the kind of love that is worth way more then some twit and his poor desion skills.

condums and other items are not fall proof. one little microscopic hole and vola theres a bun in the oven.

Thanks Lilu. It's good to see someone who knows the sad truth, the part about abortion that no one wants to face.

It's sad to me how when you present facts like most women are emotionally scarred by abortion that people jump all over you. I actually care alot about my fellow women....and for this reason, I try to tell the truth.

Because once you have those "cells" sucked out of you, there's no going back. And you are left with this emptiness....

Did you know that when abortion is in progress that the embrio trys to move away and cling to the uteran wall. Kinda makes you think .

No, I had not heard that sad fact before. But it doesn't surprise me.

What is so painful for many post-abortion is the awareness that they've destroyed something totally unique, that can never be again. I actually believe that the spirit is not destroyed, and could be born again. But the person they could have been, at the time they or God chose for them to come to this earth -- that chance is destroyed through abortion.

how about you ladies start your own anti abortion thread.. this one isn't about that. thanks

may,if it s difficult now , it will be more so later, with the stress of a baby/child that you cant [switch a button] off when you are tired and stressed and they are crying and upset. just make up your mind , abortion, adopt it out or do ya wont the child?...then deal with it...then get along the business of your self honey and waist no more pretty brain cells obsessing about this guys, he is not worth it. [[[[[take out a loan and go to school, with the goal of doing a career you think you would like.]]]]] ya i know feelings are feelings...love is love...we still can live..even with out it...unfortuanatly with out it. also it is ok if ya need help with depression and or anxiety:)

Of course, I'm still in love with him, although I know it's useless, but I cannot avoid it, I just hope some day this feeling disappear. Anyway, thanks for your help.

And it just like curing pneumonia or other illness? You really think so?

It doesn't matter if it's 3 days after conception or not. Child is a child. Mothers do their best if they make their child live.


And it doesn't has connection with being Christian or not. As an atheist I used to think the same.

ale jaja kochanie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i think same u must tell her and i thin he deserve to meet your friends ass well :)