child support order.

markskibniewskiThreads: 4 Posts: 357 Joined: May 31, 09 ♂	Jan 24, 12, 12:38 #31
jasondmzk: No. It's not money for HER. It's money for the CHILD. It's most definitely on him. Yeah and if you believe that I have a nice bridge to sell you. But besides this, the chances of OP getting forced visitation from Poland is probably slim and will take cash and time. This is about visitation not the money for the child.

HarryThreads: 62 Posts: 8,508 Joined: May 2, 07 ♂ [Suspended]	Jan 24, 12, 12:42 #32
bourdainab: I SENT BIKE,POOL You posted her a pool? I dread to think what the postal charges on that were. markskibniewski: the chances of OP getting forced visitation from Poland is probably slim and will take cash and time. He actually has a reasonable chance of getting access. But as you say, time and money will be needed.

♂

Jan 24, 12, 13:28 #33

Don't bother writing to Polish Goverment organisations. The response will be more or less feck off your not Polish and even though I read and write in English I'm not going to help you unless you write in Polish..

You need to get to Poland and see a good lawyer. Do your research first as most lawyers will treat you as a cash cow and are not very good. It is hard to find a good one, I know from experience, but there are a few out there. First of all disclose her rough location, for example Poznan, and ask for personal reccomendations here for good solicitors. Don't post her address, thats not nice and really stupid.

Prepare yourself for a suprise in ccourt. You will be everything evil under the sun but the generally the Polish judges are prepared to listen and will support you in your efforts to see your child. The most important thing is you provide evidence. You of course will be portrayed as an alcholic but where is her evidence? You can pre empt this by getting a hair test done. Do not rely on the court providing an interpreter, you must arrange this and fund it yourself.

Evidence Evidence Evidence. This is the most important thing in a Polish court.

I wish you luck if your true intentions are to have a relationship with your child. If it is purely to make her life a misery, think very carefully what you are doing. Live and let live and file it away in the draw of experiences to learn from.

♀

Jan 24, 12, 13:44 #34

bourdainab:

here it is!!my ex wife was 28 wks prego when she bought 1-way ticket and left the country.now i have to give her money for the child?

If the child is yours - yes, you do have to give her money for the child. This is law. I t doesn't matter that she left.
What I wonder however is WHY 28 week pregnant women buys 1-way ticket and leaves the father behind?
Looking at that she desperately wanted the child to be born in Poland DESPITE the fact that having child born in USA would give her right to stay in USA till child is grown up (usually mothers of USA citizens don't get deported without solid reason).
Now - this is beyond me to phantom what went wrong here and why she did it (or whose fault it was...)
Whatever happened - you are obliged by law to contribute to your child upbringing. 1200 PLN is not excessive.
You are right in your expectation of visitation rights, unless court takes them away from you.
Get a good lawyer.

TRACY83

Jan 24, 12, 16:01 #35

Not much you can do other than go for visitation rights and make sure she doesn't get an increase in maintenance, she will almost definitely try for an increase at some time.
Unfortunately getting pregant and claiming child support seems to be regarded as a perfectly acceptable way of making money by quite a large number of Polish Women and if the mug comes from a country with a good exchange rate $400-500 or sterling goes a long way in Poland,hence the disappearing act. There are nice women from Poland but they are not the ones who seem to be desired by men from other countries! Seems to me that women in Poland need to be better educated,taught that you get what you work for plus a few moral values! As for the daft men who get shafted by these women, LEARN WHAT CONTRACEPTION MEANS AND WHERE CONTRACEPTIVES CAN BE OBTAINED AND HOW TO USE THEM!!!!!!

HarryThreads: 62 Posts: 8,508 Joined: May 2, 07 ♂ [Suspended]	Jan 24, 12, 16:10 #36
TRACY83: $400-500 or sterling goes a long way in Poland Please don't bang on about things which you clearly know nothing about: $400 per month is what a nanny charges monthly for six hours per day.

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Jan 24, 12, 16:28 #37

sa11y:

What I wonder however is WHY 28 week pregnant women buys 1-way ticket and leaves the father behind?
Looking at that she desperately wanted the child to be born in Poland DESPITE the fact that having child born in USA would give her right to stay in USA till child is grown up (usually mothers of USA citizens don't get deported without solid reason).

Right, Sally, it does seem a bit of desperate move, hardly done without good reason, one would think.
I have known

some

men who carry around pictures of their kids as cute toddlers in their wallet to show people in the pub, and cry that their evil ex wife left, usually for no good reason, and doesn't let them see them, when in reality they have made no effort or contribution for the last X amount of years, and they were crap nasty husbands which in fact is why their wife left in the first place...;)
Have a nice day, y'all.

♀

Jan 24, 12, 16:41 #38

TRACY83:

$400-500 or sterling goes a long way in Poland,hence the disappearing act

Are you freaking mad????? 400/500 pounds (usd even less!) does not go far enough to warrant disappearance of a mother from a decent father. Woman who does something like that does not do it for money. For whatever reason she does not want to be with the father of the child, but the child still has right to maintenance. The mother could have perfectly good reason to do this - yes, the guy has rights, but he actually needs to move his a** and do something about his rights.

TRACY83

Jan 24, 12, 17:19 #39

Harry:

Please don't bang on about things which you clearly know nothing about:

sa11y:

Are you freaking mad????? 400/500 pounds

At current exchange rates $400 is nearly the average wage in Poland and £500 is okay too.
Supposing that the lady in question decides to work, having her child care payments taken care of is one big bonus!!
Chances are though, that she is obtaining help with child care from her parents and giving them some extra cash for their help. Possibly she might be slipping a few zloity to a friend who is at home with her own children. If this man is genuinely paying thee maintenance, she is getting a significant boost in finances, she may well have another man by now who will be providing too. I can't say why this marriage broke down but I have seen plenty of decent Polish men and men from other nationalities being taken to the cleaners by Polish women.
Talk to a few Poles of both sexes and see what they say!!

HarryThreads: 62 Posts: 8,508 Joined: May 2, 07 ♂ [Suspended]	Jan 24, 12, 17:38 #40
" At current exchange rates $400 is nearly the average wage in Poland" $400 isn't even the minimum wage, let alone the average wage (which is now over $1,000 per month despite the zloty being hugely under-valued.

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Edited by: sa11y Jan 24, 12, 17:48 #41

Tracy, there is a big difference between usd and pounds, exchange is 1,6 usd to 1pound so 500 pounds might be ok, while 400 usd will be a lot less. And all this may be true as far as help of parents or friends with kids go, but Polish men are not very keen to support somebody elses child. She might have a live out boyfriend but chances for more are limited. Yes, surely having 400 usd is better than having nothing and yes, some people live on such salary for a month but what sort of life is that? If you honestly think that this is a lot go to Poland and see how long it lasts. Good luck.

bourdainab

Jan 24, 12, 21:18 #42

explain why i should pay more than fathers do here in u.s.a(michigan).their kid or kids are in the same country or state.it's not money for her,it's for the child?really??the child NEEDS THERE FATHER,not MONEY.this whole situation is messed up!!not my problem if the nanny has a rate on $400 per month....ONCE AGAIN THE MOTHER SHOULDVE THINK BOUT THAT BEFORE LEAVING THE COUNTRY!!whats next??i have to pay for her bus fare??come on people GET REAL!!!or hold on,maybe i should sell my house and car so i can pay for child support.
WHERE ARE THE RIGHTS FOR THE FATHER??DID I MENTION EX WIFE TOOK 60K OUT THE BANK 2DAYS BEFORE GETTING ON THE PLANE....worst thing of all,SHE TOOK AWAY MY UNBORN CHILD!!!!!!!

♂

Jan 24, 12, 21:28 #43

Settle down, big guy. You co-created this child. It's your responsibility to pay for his/her care wherever he or she might live. If you don't wanna do that, I suggest you look into the myriad forms of birth control available. I'm starting to get the sense that your child's mother may have been sensible in her exodus. You want to dictate what and where your money goes to? Too bad. You made this kid. Pay up.

rozumiemnicThreads: 4 Posts: 1,024 Joined: Nov 16, 09 ♀	Jan 24, 12, 21:31 #44
bourdainab: DID I MENTION EX WIFE TOOK 60K OUT THE BANK 2DAYS BEFORE GETTING ON THE PLANE....worst thing of all,SHE TOOK AWAY MY UNBORN CHILD!!!!!!! with no reason whatsoever? It would take a lot for a pregnant woman to leave a husband and get on a plane at that stage of pregnancy. A LOT!!!!!

cyga	Jan 24, 12, 21:57 #45
bourdainab: or hold on,maybe i should sell my house and car so i can pay for child support. No need, the court will do that for you. bourdainab: WHERE ARE THE RIGHTS FOR THE FATHER??DID I MENTION EX WIFE TOOK 60K OUT THE BANK 2DAYS BEFORE GETTING ON THE PLANE....worst thing of all,SHE TOOK AWAY MY UNBORN CHILD!!!!!!! No wonder, you are constantly shouting.

bourdainab

Jan 24, 12, 22:02 #46

alot i know!!!!maybe cuz she didnt know who's the father.maybe that explains why she refuse to take dna test till the court order one.
JASONDMZK..big guy hope this dont happen to you,wonder if you'ld be willing to dish out cash as the mothers please,and u still have no rights.and yes nda proved its mine,but that dont change the fact i cant be in my daughters life like a normal father/daughter relationship....SIT ON THAT BIG GUY:)PEOPLE WISH TO MAKE 1200ZL PER MONTH IN POLAND.this woman makes that for lieing,and running away like a coward

♂

Jan 25, 12, 01:49 #47

She would rather raise this kid on her own, than stay with the father of her child that she obviously has no love for. She would rather flee the country that you are in, rather than stay and have you lay one eye on your child. She would rather take the time and expense of dragging you both through the courts, risking not get a single dime, than to just be together as a family. That doesn't sound like cowardice, that sounds like courage under fire. You obviously gave her good reason. I hear a lot of bellyaching about money, and very little about not being a part of your child's life. Be a man, take your medicine.

♂

Edited by: markskibniewski Jan 25, 12, 02:33 #48

bourdainab:

I MENTION EX WIFE TOOK 60K OUT THE BANK 2DAYS BEFORE GETTING ON THE PLANE....worst thing of all,SHE TOOK AWAY MY UNBORN CHILD!!!!!!!

No offense but now I am starting to really not believe your story. If in fact she took the money, that is criminal and your wife may be extridited from Poland. If convicted you would end up with your daughter anyway. Second if you did in fact have 60 k in the bank you are making some nice coin and $400.00 per month is chump change.

Harry:

$400 per month is what a nanny charges monthly for six hours per day.

here it can cost $400 for one week max 2 for a nanny. So that is not a bad sum of money. Lets not forget folks that he is supposed to share in his daughters upbringing not pay for it all especially since he doesn't get to see her. That $400.00 was supposed to guarantee him at least every other weekend plus vacation time and every other holiday. Now he has got nothing. Before all of you divorced women start casting stones at the guy maybe you should take a hard look at how you would feel if you were stripped of your child .

jasondmzk:

She would rather raise this kid on her own, than stay with the father of her child that she obviously has no love for. She would rather flee the country that you are in, rather than stay and have you lay one eye on your child. She would rather take the time and expense of dragging you both through the courts, risking not get a single dime, than to just be together as a family. That doesn't sound like cowardice, that sounds like courage under fire. You obviously gave her good reason. I hear a lot of bellyaching about money, and very little about not being a part of your child's life. Be a man, take your medicine.

You are assuming that this wasn't a scam by the women to get pregnant and use the kid as a sweet paycheck.

jasondmzkThreads: 31 Posts: 503 Joined: Jun 1, 11 ♂	Jan 25, 12, 02:36 #49
markskibniewski: That $400.00 was supposed to guarantee him at least every other weekend plus vacation time and every other holiday. That's money for the upbringing of his child, not a rental fee. markskibniewski: Now he has got nothing. Lesson: Be careful whom you impregnate.

♀

Edited by: rozumiemnic Jan 25, 12, 02:43 #50

markskibniewski:

You are assuming that this wasn't a scam by the women to get pregnant and use the kid as a sweet paycheck

and you seem to be assuming it was.......
'sweet paycheck' my fat azz, like having a kid as a single mother is an easy option to get a few dollars/quid/zlotych a month...? what?
I think most women would rather work in an office or whatever until they meet a GOOD man with whom to start a family. Sadly our judgement on this is often wrong.
meh...what do we know of the true facts, except that this OP is getting boring WITH HIS SHOUTY CAPITALS, and a lot of you seem to have a very low opinion of women. See above.
Oh and MARK, child support and access are two separate issues.

♂

Edited by: markskibniewski Jan 25, 12, 04:40 #51

jasondmzk:

That's money for the upbringing of his child, not a rental fee.

Your right it was an agreement that the state of Michigan set forth to ensure what was best for the child....... which she has renigged on.

rozumiemnic:

and you seem to be assuming it was.......

I am assuming nothing I merely presented it as an alternate possibility rather than this guy getting shreaded by most of the posters here. If you have read all my posts you would understand this.

♂

Edited by: markskibniewski Jan 25, 12, 04:55 #52

rozumiemnic:

'sweet paycheck' my fat azz, like having a kid as a single mother is an easy option to get a few dollars/quid/zlotych a month...? what?
I think most women would rather work in an office or whatever until they meet a GOOD man with whom to start a family. Sadly our judgement on this is often wrong.
meh...what do we know of the true facts, except that this OP is getting boring WITH HIS SHOUTY CAPITALS, and a lot of you seem to have a very low opinion of women. See above.

Not sure where the low opinion of women comment came from but whatever.... and by the way $400 .00 a month in Poland is not horrible it is supposed to supplement her income to help with the child not buy her a fur coat and a mercedes. of course that is just for starters.. If he ever remarries (and his wife makes more than him) that amount could double or even triple. Listen I am on no one's side but the child here. I think a father's love and influence can go a long way....especially one that wants to spend time with the child ...when so many today could care less to show up or even pay child care for that matter. (I am making this statement assuming that the OP is not looking for a cheaper way out and is really interested in his childs welfare)

bourdainab

Jan 25, 12, 22:04 #53

rental fee??WHAT R U TALKING ABOUT???I'm sure you would pay right away if ur wife took off on to another country,and now you have no control how ur own daughter is be rasied...A 4 yr old child doesnt know the meaning of a dollar/zloty.A father wants to be a father.but cant due difficult situation the MOTHER put everyone in!!!!
ALL I'M ASKING FOR IS TO BE ABLE HAVE CONTACT WITH MY DAUGHTER,not just send money and i dont even know if she still has the child.If you want you can go meet this woman&find out for urself.....go to targowek:)

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