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Help me understand the different mannerisms and mentality of men in Przemysl area!


bita4u 1 | 3
13 Oct 2011 #1
what are families in rural Przemysl like?

In the past two months I've met a lovely Polish guy from Przemysl, from a small town. He has talked about wanting to go and visit his family and how much he misses it there. I want to take him there as I don't think he has any money. The only problem is I'm originally from Tehran, of middle eastern descent, and I don't know how his family would feel towards me. Although I might add that whilst looking up Polish history etc. I found out that during the war Tehran helped thousands of Polish people (unlike the british and russia), so that's a good thing, but I don't wish to make my Polish guy embarrassed or anything.

Also I want to know what the mentality of men are like in that area, as I sometimes think he lies to me but I can't tell,(I always know when English people are lying to me, but completely hopeless on all others). I have LOADS of questions to ask, and I don't have anyone here to help, and he doesn't seem to understand a lot of what I say, but he is learning fast :) Please help me understand the different mannerisms, as I have gotten cross with him a few times and then find out later how upset he's gotten over it, he feels sorry, I feel sorry, over what I HOPE is miss communacation- (otherwise he's a good actor and a liar :(, please help as I have been hurt very badly in the past.

Thank-you
Polsyr 6 | 760
13 Oct 2011 #2
Be brave and take a leap of faith :)

A few years ago I was in your shoes, and I was afraid too... Now I am happily married :)
EdWilczynski 3 | 98
13 Oct 2011 #3
Polish people (unlike the british and russia),

Tell that to the 450,900 British that gave their lives in WW2....... Up yours!!
peterweg 37 | 2,311
13 Oct 2011 #4
I found out that during the war Tehran helped thousands of Polish people (unlike the british and russia),

Err, the British persuaded Stalin to release Polish prisoners who made their way to Iran to join the British Army and air force. Whatever else they did (and their motives), the British fed, clothed and armed the Poles in Anders army. My father spent 3 years in Egypt and Greece training to be a flight engineer with the British air force. He settled in the UK, many others settled there and around the British Empire.

Research it further here

encrypted.google.com/search?q=forgotton+oddesy&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-GB:official&client=firefox-a#hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=VWL&rls=org.mozilla:en-GB:official&sa=X&ei=JNuWTpucIq_Y4QTL9vGdBA&ved=0CBYQvwUoAQ&q=forgotten+odyssey &spell=1&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=4c76d6f44bd0f902&biw=1280&bih=587

The Russians, however, put the Poles in a concentration camp and half of them starved to death or they simply executed them in the case of the officers.
EdWilczynski 3 | 98
13 Oct 2011 #5
Research it further here

Why would she bother researching......far simpler to make retarded ill informed and sweeping statements like the one above.

Lets hope the people in rural Przemysl don't treat her with the same ignorance she has just demonstrated!!!!!
gumishu 13 | 6,134
13 Oct 2011 #6
The only problem is I'm originally from Tehran, of middle eastern descent, and I don't know how his family would feel towards me

most Polish people are unaware of the fates of Polish people and Polish troops evacuated from Russia to Iran, so don't expect people to act on it

yes, people would be pretty much estranged by you background, your looks, probably your religion too - so you can feel pretty alienated - the language barrier will be an important obstacle - your boyfriend attitudes probably won't help you possibly quite contrary - it's because people fall into old ruts when they return to the environments they are familiar with - so don't expect an enthusiastic welcome (I don't say it's impossible but rather not to be expected) and a lot of support from your Polish guy - I can only tell you what I would do about the whole matter (the visit) - I would withdraw into myself and just be there and observe and try not stick out too much - if you somehow stick out anyway don't think much about it and don't let yourself feel embarassed - not opening your mouth that much, just smiling, showing gratitude and appreciation is actually very much approved (and to some degree expected) attitude of a female partner of a Polish man among his family (background)
isthatu2 4 | 2,694
13 Oct 2011 #7
I found out that during the war Tehran helped thousands of Polish people (unlike the british

Erm, off topic, but try reading a history book not written by some mad Ayatolah..... Iran had its freedom in WW2 only until it decided to give shelter to hundreds of nazis,it was taken over for the duration of the war in August 1941 by a joint British /Soviet force. Polish soldiers only started arriving in Iran in 1942.

So, sorry to say, "your" government/people did zip for the Poles, they made there own way or were taken by Russians to the british sector of Iran and then supported by the british, so there :)

Edit ps, hadnt seen others had said almost the same, but,to restate Irans leader was pro Nazi, (or to be charitable, Anti british), Iran can take absolutly no credit for helping Anders Army, in fact, even the Russians can hand on heart be said to have done more.

EDIT 2
Apart from all that nonsense. Hope all goes well for you, in matters of the heart petty things can be overlooked :)
hythorn 3 | 580
13 Oct 2011 #8
quite possibly she learned this anti British sentiments from her male consort

in that case, they are well suited to each other

in Cumbria there is a saying 'they won't spoil two households'

I love that expression and try to use it whenever I can
isthatu2 4 | 2,694
13 Oct 2011 #9
quite possibly she learned this anti British sentiments from her male consort

frankly Hythorn, the Iranians have far more "right" to hold ancient grudges against the British than the Poles will ever have......
Britain gave shelter to hundreds of thousands of Poles, at the same time it was carving up Irans oil fields and occupying the country. Mind,Poles shouldnt complain,without the British there the Poles would have been handed straight over to the nazis.
hythorn 3 | 580
13 Oct 2011 #10
at the same time it was carving up Irans oil fields and occupying the country

not a bad idea at the time
the alternative would have been to put up a big sign, preferably written in German inviting the Hun to help themselves to the oil

note to self: I am starting to sound like Bertie Wooster more and more
gumishu 13 | 6,134
13 Oct 2011 #11
without the British there the Poles would have been handed straight over to the nazis.

without the British there the Poles could have actuallly marched with Hitler on Moscow - read some Paweł Wieczorkiewicz on that matter (well you will probably have to learn Polish to read it - but well Wieczorkiewicz was a serious historian - just ask an avarage Polish historian and you wil find out)
boletus 30 | 1,361
13 Oct 2011 #12
I know you Brits are all angry for bita4u statement :

I found out that during the war Tehran helped thousands of Polish people (unlike the british and russia).

I hope she is just uninformed and partial to what her culture remembers from those times, but I have to point out that many Poles, especially former children in Iran, actually owe the Iranians a big gratitude.

I already recommended this online source in some other thread:

The General Langfitt Story, 
Polish Refugees Recount Their Experiences of Exile, Dispersal and Resettlement

 By Maryon Allbrook and Helen Cattalini 
ISBN 0 644 35781 9, First Published 1995, immi.gov.au/media/publications/refugee/langfitt/

In particular "Chapter 5 - Dispersal" , section "En route to Pahlavi and Tehran" deals with the topic of interest. Estimated 600 people died in Pahlavi, many of them children. Later in Tehran help was coming from everywhere: "from Jews, Persians, British, and Americans who were concerned about the plight of the Polish refugees", from Polish government in exile, International Red Cross, UNRRA.

In Isphahan, once the capital city of the Shahs, a 'magnificent centre was created for school children, its six schools and boarding houses loaned by European and American nuns.

Isphahan - a.k.a. A city of Polish children.
isthatu2 4 | 2,694
13 Oct 2011 #13
without the British there the Poles could have actuallly marched with Hitler on Moscow

Well, frankly, a right wing military dictatorship with so many things in common with nazi germany at the time, yes,it is one of histories surprises that the Poles didnt just agree to a little road and railway and then jump on Hitlers coat tails in exactly the same way as all the other new countries in the east did.

So if you want to "Blame" britain for Poland doin the right thing,crack on mate. Personnaly I think thats a little unfair to the many Poles who would never have joined one devil to fight another.

I know you Brits are all angry for bita4u statement

No, not angry, she was obviously playing for her percieved audience, TBH, on a "Polish Forum" it would to new people seem a safe bet to slag off Brits and Russians.

Its just a shame that the tens of thousands of Poles who found a home here in Britain seem completly forgoten in the rush to butt kiss .

Like I said, an Iranian with bitterness over old history with Britain has far more cause and right than any Pole.
Vincent 9 | 892
13 Oct 2011 #14
It seems the OP may have made an"error of judgement" in her post and some members have now corrected her. I'm quite sure that she didn't expect the thread to go this way and would omit that sentence if she could turn back time.

The thread is now reopened in the hope that someone can advise her on her original question about Przemysl.
isthatu2 4 | 2,694
14 Oct 2011 #15
Oh, Ive just noticed something else Vincent,sorry cannot let this lie. The Op claims to be origionaly from Tehran. Comes on a Polish forum and says how bad Britain was to Poles and how Iran gave them asylum (not true,but bare with me).

I found out that during the war Tehran helped thousands of Polish people (unlike the british

She can always tell when English people are lying she also claims,

I always know when English people are lying to me

yet, surprise sur friggin prise, guess where she fled to from tehran,presumably to seek asylum, thats right,A star for keeping up, yeps, that Evil britain...............FFS

Either the OPs post was a total flame or she just sums up why a percentage of British people have got sick to the back teeth with asylum seekers and economic migrants.

Also I want to know what the mentality of men are like in that area

Nice sweeping judgment on Polish lads too. Yes,maybe a good idea to leave britain, you obviously hate it here in leafy suburbia ,but something tells me that even if Poland rolls out the red carpet for you it wont be long till you look for greener grass and will no doubt be on line insulting your Polish hosts to the next target country...nice.
DonAlfonsoPerez - | 6
14 Oct 2011 #16
as long as you are not a jew you' re gonna be fine

BTW all men are the same ;)
peterweg 37 | 2,311
14 Oct 2011 #17
the Poles didnt just agree to a little road and railway and then jump on Hitlers coat tails in exactly the same way as all the other new countries in the east did.

Hitler offered Poland a pact, but the Poles didn't trust the Germans, obviously they were right not too, given his plans to do the same to the Catholics as he did to the Jews.
PWEI 3 | 612
14 Oct 2011 #18
Either the OPs post was a total flame or she just sums up why a percentage of British people have got sick to the back teeth with asylum seekers and economic migrants.

Nail and head right there.
carrie65 2 | 40
15 Oct 2011 #19
[Interesting comments on this thread but to get back to the original point.

Be brave and take a leap of faith :)

quote]

Yes you have to take risks in any relationship, scary but true. Most of us have been hurt at some time but that's life!!!

A few words of advice which I hope will be useful!
Don't discuss the war, it was a long time ago, the Poles were occupied and it's difficult to know what any of us would do in a stuation like that.

Politicians make wars and many people lost their lives, probably did things they wouldn't normally do and some times every nation made bad decisions!

Listen if people tell you about their experiences but don't voice your opinions until you are totally settled in the family.

I sometimes think he lies to me but I can't tell

This could be a language thing or the fact that Polish men don't like to be seen doing anything silly or wrong, they come out with the most long winded explanations for everything which can give an impression of lies. Just make it clear you'd prefer the truth however bad!

I want to take him there as I don't think he has any money.

Don't pay for him to go, it's not a healthy precedent to set in any relationship even if one person has more money than the other. Your man should always contribute something to the relationship financially, I would say the same to man, the woman should contribute financially too. if the two of you ever have a family of your own, the financial dynamics may have to change but until then both contribute or resentment will creep in.

The only problem is I'm originally from Tehran, of middle eastern descent, and I don't know how his family would feel towards me.

If your man is okay with you, forget about what the family think. there is no shame in being any nationality be proud of your origins!!!! If your man has problems with your nationality get rid of him!!!!

Hope this is some help, good wishes for you bothX
Polsyr 6 | 760
15 Oct 2011 #20
it's not a healthy precedent

Very good insight...
OP bita4u 1 | 3
18 Oct 2011 #21
Oh my gosh, lots of angry people. I wasn't refering to none of that above, sorry guys.

I didn't write what I was thinking at the time, and I have just re-read what I've written.

In my head I was ONLY refering to the period of time when the British and Russians were HELPING the Polish over but ended up dying because of the food and hygiene that was given to them. It was only refering to that ONE incident when they were entering Iran, with the help of the British !!

**** I really ought to have read my script before sending it out there, sorry but it was late and it was rushed, I should have explained FULLY, if at all !!

I know my WW history and I had no intention of upsetting anyone, I have full respect and have been to MANY memorials, in England and France. Sorry for not explaining my-self. I have none of those horriable things said about me, in my heart, honestly

But Thank-you all for your lovely, kind, understanding words. so much love xxxx

Gosh you are one angry person.

I miswrote something. I was thinking of one particular story in my head, but not writtng it down!! I was only referring to one incident, and that was on the arrivals of the Polish into Iran, that's all.

I didn't realise EVERY little comment would be digested and pulled out of proportion. You sound like a woman. Oh my God.. I must not like woman !!??

I'm being sarcastic by the way. Perhaps you should take up sport instead of fuming out hate!!

I just didn't explain my-self better.

Also you have NO idea of the history of Iran, besides the propaganda snipets you've read.

Read the MIRROR or Daily Mail by any chance????

The above comments are for ISTHATUZ. No I am not a asylum seeker, my father worked hard, and all my family work hard!!
ShortHairThug - | 1,101
18 Oct 2011 #22
Don't discuss the war

Good advice, common sense really for anyone that spent a day or two on this forum.

Just make it clear you'd prefer the truth however bad!

A little white lie never hurt anyone, we all do it. I don’t think it’s such a good idea as women always tend to blow it out of proportion no matter how trivial it might be. Deep down, you don’t want to hear the truth.

Don't pay for him to go

What makes you think he would even entertain such proposal? I personally would be insulted, not exactly from Przemyśl myself but born and raised in that area.

If your man is okay with you, forget about what the family think. there is no shame in being any nationality be proud of your origins!!!! If your man has problems with your nationality get rid of him!!!!

Oh please, what a load of ……. They just met, neither she nor you know anything about his family or what the reaction might be so why are You so judgmental, watched too many movies about villagers’ with pitch-forks in hand perhaps? Time to shad your childhood nightmares; trust me it was only a movie.

Oh my gosh, lots of angry people.

Lots of history buffs but none seem to get it right; each and every one sees it from their own perspective.

I didn't write what I was thinking at the time, and I have just re-read what I've written.

What exactly are you apologizing for? People taking your single sentence comment out of context, making more out of it then was intended? It reflects badly on them, not you.

People’s comments on an open forum are often misleading, full of anger and stereotypes. The advice they give especially in the affairs of the heart often stem from their own past failed relationships. You know him for two months and you seem to have problem communicating take a step back if need be, give it some time for your relationship to develop and mature then and only then it’s time to meet the family, besides that will give him time to stand on his own two feet if his financial situation is in such dire-straits as you think it is. Whatever you do, stop asking for advice on forums such as this and I guarantee you’ll find happiness.

My father worked very hard all his life and so do all my family, so I don't own england anthing!!

Now there’s a spirit.
pawian 221 | 24,014
18 Oct 2011 #23
=bita4u]as I have gotten cross with him a few times and then find out later how upset he's gotten over it, he feels sorry, I feel sorry,

How is sex between you? Is it perfect?

If it is, stick to your guy, marry him and have a lot of wonderful intelligent children that will contribute their rich Iranian heritage into Polish culture.

But if there is one thing in your sex that worries you, drop your guy because your relationship is going to break sooner or later.
carrie65 2 | 40
19 Oct 2011 #24
Deep down, you don’t want to hear the truth

OH yes we do !!!!!!!!!!!! every lttle detail!!!!!!!!

What makes you think he would even entertain such proposal?

He probably wouldn't entertain any such suggestion, but it's advice I would give anyone if they appear to be offering to spend large amounts of money on some one because they think that person doesn't have money.

You so judgmental,

Didn't mean to be but the lady did write

but I don't wish to make my Polish guy embarrassed or anything

The only problem is I'm originally from Tehran

she sounded worried about this and nobody should worry about their nationality. Did think your analogy to the film was hilarious though!
I promise I will hide the pitchfork whenever my son brings a girl home!!!!!!!!
OP bita4u 1 | 3
19 Oct 2011 #25
Thanks for the last three replies.
I am not embarassed or worried about my nationality, gosh I was raised in Plymouth, (a small english town, that do have the 'pitchforks'), If I can take it there, even by the teachers-(the adults were the worst!), I'm pretty confident in my-self anywhere I go.

I was only thinking of my partner, I don't wish him to be uncomfotable.
In any case, I was thinking of taking him during Christmas. I want to book a room at 'Zamek W Krasiczynie', as he did mention it and how much him and his mum always wanted to go and have a look at the place, (don't know why they never just walked in and nosed about?) Anyways, whilst I'm doing stuff there, (want to go exploring about the hills, etc.), he can go and visit his family.

I think it would be a great Christmas surprise. I work two jobs, as well as online surveys, so I don't have a lot of money, but I managed to find flights for £75 Return, yeah.. so I wouldn't be spending a fortune on him, (I probably would if I did have money though), but thank-you so much for the advice.

As for the sex..well when he kisses me I just melt, he seems to want to squeeze me alot and kisses me a lot and he's always playing with my hair and smelling me, all of which is very sweet, different, and lovingly done, but slightly claustrophobic, and so tight that I can't breath, but affectionate :) yeah kissing is great, which is very important to me, as you can't teach someone to be a great kisser, as for sex, well it's 'old fashioned', I guess you can say, but i have a lot to teach him and it be very fun doing so...just wish he could last longer! But am a great teacher.

Also is it a normal thing for Polish men to say I LOVE YOU, after just a week? we might have been together every bit of the day, (had 2 weeks off work), it usual takes me a year, and guys here between 3-9 weeks before they come out with I Love You. He says it all the time, which I find this annoying, I've told him you can't possiable love me this quick, especially as you don't know me. Everytime I seem to ask him a question he doesn't want to answer or know how to, he smiles, grabs me and strokes my hair and tells me he loves me...???

Does he think this is what English girls like to hear all the time ?

Anyways coming end of the month I'll book the ticket to Poland, and i can't imagine him being angry about it, and his mum will be really happy, and I can have a great time wondering around Przemysl. Are there plenty of pubs dotted around, and how would it be a woman by her-self walking in. Do they sell a meter of beer there :)

Any advice of places I can go. Also although i speak french, Farsi, a bit of German and Arabic, I can't seem to get my head around, or my tongue around the Polish language. I have even got my-self a translator so when i'm at work i can type in some words to learn, but I'm finding it hard to pronounce the words, and on the internet they say the words too fast, and I've been told I sound Italian when I try to speak polish. My question is, if i try to speak Polish, via using my very limited word translator, and phrase book, and say things wrong, (which i'll obviously will!), will that offend people?? Is it best if i just keep my mouth shut and just nod and point and look stupid?
gumishu 13 | 6,134
19 Oct 2011 #26
Also is it a normal thing for Polish men to say I LOVE YOU, after just a week?

the guy is emotionally unstable - you can expect serious downs in your relationship - if not the rages of envy then weeks of silence and depression - you can fall in love instantly (or almost instantly) - but if you are a serious stable person you just don't say it right away (or I think so)

My question is, if i try to speak Polish, via using my very limited word translator, and phrase book, and say things wrong, (which i'll obviously will!), will that offend people??

it will not offend them but can perhaps leave a baddish taste in their mouths (if they are traditional people and not very open minded) - just learn a couple of phrases like - dziękuję (thank you), dzień dobry (good day, good morning, good afternoon), przepraszam (excuse me also I'm sorry) - use iwona.com to learn the pronounciation - your write a Polish word in the main box on the website and the software will pronounce it for you (you can choose a couple of voices)

you just don't say it right away (or I think so)

OK - I may have got it wrong

add to that words like - toaleta (toilet), łazienka (bathroom), godzina (hour), która godzina? (what's the time?)
Crow 155 | 9,025
19 Oct 2011 #27
Please help me understand the different mannerisms and mentality of men in Przemysl area!

just tell me- are they devoted Sarmats?
OP bita4u 1 | 3
20 Oct 2011 #28
no they're not.


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