My husband is Polish and I was wondering why he drinks all the time.

salsaThreads: 2 Posts: 11 Joined: Nov 9, 09 ♀	Nov 9, 09, 20:21 #1
My husband is Polish and I am African American, when I met him he told me he doesnt drink often. Now he has increased his drinking about 10x the amount he used to. I always hear that Polish people drink alot but I thought they can also hold their liquor as well(meaning not a drunk). I guess the questions is why the need for the binge drinking?

McCoyThreads: 46 Posts: 1,756 Joined: Jul 3, 08 ♂	Edited by: McCoy Nov 9, 09, 20:24 #2
salsa: My husband is Polish and I was wondering why he drinks all the time. theres already an answer in this question

gumishuThreads: 17 Posts: 3,943 Joined: Apr 6, 09 ♂	Edited by: gumishu Nov 9, 09, 20:28 #3
binge drinking is a downward spiral - it is in a way self-propelling - it is only possible for a an individual to get out of the vicious circle if he is determined to do so (because he finds something better in his life than numbing himself - you can't really help him out if he doesn't want to

SeanBMThreads: 41 Posts: 8,727 Joined: Mar 10, 08 ♂	Nov 9, 09, 20:51 #4
Hello salsa, And welcome to the Polish forums. I think that in certain parts of the U.S. the idea of drinking is quite different from other parts of the world. Give us figures, how many beers or bottles of vodka does he drink in a night, a typical week, a typical month? and what is his mood when he drinks, happy, sad, stupid etc...?

z_dariusThreads: 22 Posts: 5,091 Joined: Oct 18, 07 ♂	Nov 9, 09, 21:02 #5
salsa: Now he has increased his drinking about 10x the amount he used to Do you think we will believe that? No man can have 10 bottles of vodka and wake up the next day.

pgtxThreads: 49 Posts: 6,327 Joined: Feb 14, 09 MEMBER ♀	Nov 9, 09, 21:16 #6
salsa: why the need for the binge drinking? because he got married...

KrystalThreads: 7 Posts: 108 Joined: Sep 17, 09 ♀	Nov 9, 09, 22:39 #7
To Salsa: Because he can't handle pressures. What are you doing to make him drink more? Are you working? Is he working? Is he having problem with his parents? There is some going on and he isn't telling you the truth.

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Nov 9, 09, 22:58 #8

How can any of you blame this woman for her husbands abuse of alcohol? What kind of backwards 1940's thinking is that? This is the twenty first century for crying out loud. This is the type of thing that would have come out of my grandfathers mouth...blaming others rather than taking responsibility for his being a drunk. This grandfather was Irish and married to a Polish woman...was he a drunk because she was Polish or because he was Irish? No, he was a drunk because he had an addiction to alcohol and chose to blame others rather than face the fact that he could never have another drink. Alcoholics can blame no one but themselves for drinking.

As for the lady who posed the question: I'm sure you've heard of Al-anon. I recommend that you make a call for more information regarding alcohol abuse.

polishcanuckThreads: 10 Posts: 583 Joined: Feb 11, 07 ♂	Nov 9, 09, 23:42 #9
pgtx: because he got married... bingo!!

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Nov 9, 09, 23:48 #10

salsa:

I guess the questions is why the need for the binge drinking?

sorry - the answer is 'because he is Polish'. that's what they do. it's cultural.

after a few shots, try serving him water instead of vodka - he might not notice the difference ... oh, or tell him that he is beginning to smell, that he snores and that he looks like a tramp. polish guys are usually quite vain as well, so it might stop him.

♀

Nov 9, 09, 23:50 #11

salsa:

My husband is Polish and I am African American, when I met him he told me he doesnt drink often. Now he has increased his drinking about 10x the amount he used to. I always hear that Polish people drink alot but I thought they can also hold their liquor as well(meaning not a drunk). I guess the questions is why the need for the binge drinking?

how long have you known him for? before marriage i mean
If the guy had a drinking problem before you got married and you've known each other for more than 6 months you would notice the pattern
if he started drinking heavily recently, he may have problems

♂

Nov 9, 09, 23:53 #12

It sounds as though he has a problem with alchohol...this is something that only gets worse , and he needs to get help with this....First you need to get him to accept he has a problem , then he needs the will to want to change the situation.....I believe the first stage is going to be the biggest problem.....

I have had three friends die from alchohol....the first simply drank himself to death , the second guy , in Poland hung himself after his girl left him due to his drinking , and the third guy , also Polish was well on the way to dieing from too much beer when his life was ended by his drunken girlfriend sticking a ten inch kitchen knife through his heart....

I love Polish beer , and i can get drunk now and then with the best of them , but i don,t need it , i can go months without a beer , not a problem.....

I now have a Polish friend who is like a brother to me.....he has a problem too...turned up at my house a few weeks ago...he had been drunk for five days non stop.....

It seems part of Polish culture to drink constantly , and in large ammounts , but its really not good for you , and its often seen as a way to deal with your problems , but it just gives you another problem.....

I tend to drink quite a lot during out annual biker rally , a five day party which is great , but then after that its pretty rare for me to drink , as i am usually riding or driving , but many of my friends do it night after night , and yes even when they are going to be driving.....Its a problem in Poland...not sure what the answer is.....?

ShelleySThreads: 18 Posts: 3,647 Joined: Jun 26, 07 ♀	Nov 9, 09, 23:57 #13
Maybe it just looks like hes drinking 10x more since you spend 10x more time with him now you're married.

♂

Nov 9, 09, 23:59 #14

My husband is Polish and I was wondering why he drinks all the time.

Reasons for this include:

1/ He's married to you
2/ He's not getting enough sex
3/ He's in love with an Innuit woman
4/ He's in love with an Innuit man
5/ He realizes he will never become an astronaut
6/ Aliens have taken control of his body
7/ He's Irish on his mother's side
8/ He found out that a 4 inch penis is not average
9/ He thought you were Swedish
10/He always wanted to become the Dalai Lama

Hope this helps

dnzThreads: 25 Posts: 804 Joined: Dec 2, 07 ♂	Nov 10, 09, 00:17 #15
does he wear t shirts he gets free with multipacks of lager?

Marie_CanadaThreads: 1 Posts: 4 Joined: Nov 6, 09 ♀	Nov 10, 09, 00:23 #16
I think Shelley S has a point.

JBublitzThreads: 3 Posts: 5 Joined: Sep 26, 09 ♂	Nov 10, 09, 02:58 #17
Seriously. He's Polish. We drink. Alot.

salsaThreads: 2 Posts: 11 Joined: Nov 9, 09 ♀	Nov 10, 09, 05:39 #18
Priceless, that was a good one!

gumishuThreads: 17 Posts: 3,943 Joined: Apr 6, 09 ♂	Edited by: gumishu Nov 10, 09, 10:19 #19
salsa: Priceless, that was a good one! salsa - if you are a religious person pray for him - it won't do any harm even if doesn't visibly help - pray for yourself too this is the most practical advice I can give

♀

Nov 10, 09, 11:07 #20

in Poland people either drink a looot or they don't drink at all or very little. we don't drink wine with dinner every day like the French or so much beer as Germans..but at Polish wedding during one night people can drink more alcohol than the French during all year. on the other hand, i have lots of friends who don't drink at all.
if your husband drinks more and more maybe he has some problem...

szkotja2007Threads: 38 Posts: 2,544 Joined: Dec 29, 06 ♂	Nov 10, 09, 11:27 #21
So how much is a lot Salsa ?

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Nov 10, 09, 15:26 #22

Lets just say on a Sunday at dinner maybe 6 hard drinks back to back. After work with his partner he comes back home drunk wanting to start a fight about anything. And I really do mean anything, he started a fight about my ex boyfriends years ago, lets get real. Then the next day he wants to cry about drinking so much. I study psychology in the Grad program but I was thinking it was a cultural problem before I start to address the psychology aspect of his behavior.

♂

Nov 10, 09, 15:43 #23

salsa:

Lets just say on a Sunday at dinner maybe 6 hard drinks back to back. After work with his partner he comes back home drunk wanting to start a fight about anything. And I really do mean anything, he started a fight about my ex boyfriends years ago, lets get real. Then the next day he wants to cry about drinking so much. I study psychology in the Grad program but I was thinking it was a cultural problem before I start to address the psychology aspect of his behavior.

Sorry but this guy sounds like a class A cock, Theres no excuse to ever come home drunk and start fights with your partner no matter what country he comes from. He is clearly an alcholic and needs to address this problem.

HarryThreads: 62 Posts: 8,508 Joined: May 2, 07 ♂ [Suspended]	Nov 10, 09, 16:54 #24
dnz: Sorry but this guy sounds like a class A cock You hit the nail on the head there.

BrutalButcherThreads: 1 Posts: 623 Joined: Nov 10, 09 ♂	Nov 10, 09, 18:41 #25
He drinks all the time because He's Polish...duh

nunczkaThreads: 17 Posts: 624 Joined: Sep 13, 08 ♂	Nov 10, 09, 19:33 #26
Under the same circumstances, I would stay drunk all the time too. Hoping that the nightmare will go away.

nincompoop_notThreads: 4 Posts: 229 Joined: Nov 3, 09 ♀	Nov 10, 09, 20:10 #27
salsa oh, salsa.. it was my father...they divorced after 25 years but he used to do the same. It wasn't my mum or anything. He got a job with some real nutcases and he wasn't a 'pal' until he got drunk with them. Enough to say there was jealousy, anger, suspicion, arguments, abusive beahviour etc etc... He changed jobs, people he worked with and all became normal.

♂

Edited by: SzwedwPolsce Nov 10, 09, 20:42 #28

JBublitz:

Seriously. He's Polish. We drink. Alot.

It's a myth that Poles drink more than most other people. Poles drink less than in many other European countries such as France, Italy, Spain etc. But probably Poles drink in another way than in these countries.

alc

salsaThreads: 2 Posts: 11 Joined: Nov 9, 09 ♀	Nov 10, 09, 21:01 #29
Thanks everyone you were good help.

SzwedwPolsceThreads: 13 Posts: 1,915 Joined: Feb 21, 09 ♂	Nov 10, 09, 21:02 #30
salsa: Thanks everyone you were good help. As a summary. It's very difficult for us to know why he drinks too much. Try to talk to him in one way or another.

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