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My Polish girlfriend's mother called her a prostitute because we live together


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masterThreads: 19
Posts: 23
Joined: Oct 17, 09 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 14:37    #1
went to see her mother in poland for ten days mum a called her a prostitute and went to the seaside away from her and never came back to say goodbye before she came back to england
MidasThreads: 2
Posts: 788
Joined: Jul 19, 10 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 15:02    #2
Surprised.

Most Polish mothers consider their daughter marrying a foreigner a huge success.

I guess You just met the one that doesn't.
OlafThreads: 8
Posts: 1,369
Joined: Oct 29, 09  Pictures: 1 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 15:11    #3
Midas:
Most Polish mothers consider their daughter marrying a foreigner a huge success.

Most doubtfull sentence I heard today.

@ Master: Don't worry too much. After all, you two live far enough from the "mum".
MidasThreads: 2
Posts: 788
Joined: Jul 19, 10 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 15:13    #4
Most doubtfull sentence I heard today.

Any arguments to support Your statement, mate?
Lodz_The_BoatThreads: 58
Posts: 2,314
Joined: Sep 7, 08 ♂ 		Edited by: Lodz_The_Boat  May 31, 11, 15:13    #5
Olaf:
After all, you two live far enough from the "mum".

huh?

She will never be truly happy without her mum's blessings or love ... the mum disowned her it seems.

By the way ... Midas is the SICK Psychopath of the Forum who is out there to be racist against Poles and insult on every occasion.

master:
went to see her mother in poland for ten days mum a called her a prostitute and went to the seaside away from her and never came back to say goodbye before she came back to england

Your solution is that you MARRY your girlfriend, if you cannot, then her mum is partially correct.

Why she chose a man who is not confident or responsible enough for her to get married?

If she is the reason why there is no marriage, then I guess her mum deserves to live her last days in peace by forgetting her. If that is what she wants ..
BzibziohThreads: 6
Posts: 3,657
Joined: Oct 15, 08 ♀ [Suspended] 		 May 31, 11, 15:33    #6
Midas:
Surprised.

Most Polish mothers consider their daughter marrying a foreigner a huge success.

To most Polish mums it depends on the quality of the suitor, not his passport.
WroclawThreads: 77
Posts: 7,404
Joined: Apr 1, 06  Pictures: 3 ♂ [Moderator] 		 May 31, 11, 15:40    #7
master:
went to see her mother in poland for ten days mum a called her a prostitute and went to the seaside away from her and never came back to say goodbye before she came back to england


mum doesn't like u.
MidasThreads: 2
Posts: 788
Joined: Jul 19, 10 ♂ 		Edited by: Moderator  May 31, 11, 16:03    #8
To most Polish mums it depends on the quality of the suitor, not his passport.

Not really.

Most Polish "mums" nowadays were still raised in the communist/socialist period, which basically made people in Eastern Europe consider everything in Western Europe better ( they've been licking a candy though a glass window for 50 years , so to speak ).

You don't know what I'm talking about? Ok, read this:


Here's a piece from a Polish newspaper, about a Swede that posted a personal addy ( no photo ) in 1991 in one of the Polish newspapers and had about 250 responses from Polish women that were basically throwing themselves at him. Women aged from 16 to 45.

I could also recall quite a few personal stories from the 1980's when, due to a "firma polinijna" that was operating here, I visited Poland. And, well, most male foreigners who came to Poland then actually had a problem keeping Polish women away if they were married. I also remember a young ( at the time ) Polish engineer who simply would not take his wife to any social gatherings that included foreigners ( told us he wasn't married at first ) because he figured she'd dump him as soon as she met a foreigner.

These are the "mums" we're talking about here.

So yeah, very often a foreigner staring at her daughter = dreams accomplished for a "mum" coming from such background.
NomadatNetThreads: 6
Posts: 1,492
Joined: Mar 28, 09 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:11    #9
If she is with a richer man than herself and if this is not by marriage, yes, it is prostitution (unlees she lives with him as life term darling.)
MidasThreads: 2
Posts: 788
Joined: Jul 19, 10 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:13    #10
Nomadet - You've just accused a hell lot of Polish women in London ( 70% at least ) of prostitution.
NomadatNetThreads: 6
Posts: 1,492
Joined: Mar 28, 09 ♂ 		Edited by: NomadatNet  May 31, 11, 16:16    #11
Did I accuse? I don't know. I just defined or wrote the definition of prostitution as given everywhere, just in simplest form.
JonnyMThreads: 16
Posts: 4,487
Joined: Mar 9, 11 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:21    #12
NomadatNet:
the definition of prostitution as given everywhere

As given in your imagination. One partner is often richer than another. It doesn't make one of them a prostitute.
MagdalenaThreads: 5
Posts: 1,389
Joined: Aug 15, 07 ♀ 		 May 31, 11, 16:22    #13
NomadatNet:
If she is with a richer man than herself and if this is not by marriage, yes, it is prostitution


So if I love a man who happens to have a better paid job than I do, I automatically become a prostitute? Thank you. And what if he then loses his job and I become the higher earner? Do I get my respectability back? Or does he become a gigolo?
MidasThreads: 2
Posts: 788
Joined: Jul 19, 10 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:26    #14
Actually, I'd be leaning towards Nomadet's view in quite a few cases involving Polish women in London ( can't speak for the rest of UK ).

How else are you supposed to call a girl that comes over, 2 weeks later is living with a guy whom she just met and he's paying her way ( including the London rent )? 3 years down the road she's gone back home.

So yeah, in that case "prostitute" seems to be a good call.
NomadatNetThreads: 6
Posts: 1,492
Joined: Mar 28, 09 ♂ 		Edited by: NomadatNet  May 31, 11, 16:27    #15
JonnyM:
One partner is often richer than another. It doesn't make one of them a prostitute.


Prostitutite is a term almost always used for females, not males.
For males, the term is libertine or whatever.

In most of cases, maybe always, in relations, females are poorer than their male partners. When they are not married or when they are not life term darlings, such females are called prostitutes if they are not married.
MagdalenaThreads: 5
Posts: 1,389
Joined: Aug 15, 07 ♀ 		 May 31, 11, 16:29    #16
NomadatNet:
when they are not life term darlings,


what on earth is a "life term darling"?! sounds like a jail sentence of some sort. ;->
JonnyMThreads: 16
Posts: 4,487
Joined: Mar 9, 11 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:31    #17
NomadatNet:

Prostitutite is a term almost always used for females, not males.
For males, the term is libertine or whatever.

No it isn't.
NomadatNet:

In most of cases, maybe always, in relations, females are poorer than their male partners.

Given gender inequality and the glass ceiling, women are more likely to be poorer. Still doesn't makethem prostitutes.
NomadatNet:
When they are not married or when they are not life term darlings, such females are called prostitution if they are not married.

Perhaps by you (where did you say you were from?). Somebody is a prostitute if they earn money by having sexual relations for cash. Not because their partner has a slightly better job.
NomadatNetThreads: 6
Posts: 1,492
Joined: Mar 28, 09 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:32    #18
Magdalena:
what on earth is a "life term darling"?! sounds like a jail sentence of some sort. ;->


dedicating their lifes to each others.. (may work or seperation may happen - another issue.) - philosophy behind the marriage is about this dedication, just with vowing at the beginning in front of people or institutions.

If there is no such a dedication, such a relationship is called based on monetary issues and it is prostitution.
Lodz_The_BoatThreads: 58
Posts: 2,314
Joined: Sep 7, 08 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:34    #19
Magdalena:
a prostitute

I think her momma is a person of values and pure sentiments. She values the institution of marriage, and wished her daughter to be with a man who would not shy away from taking the honor of this responsibility with confidence.

There is a limit to becoming rebellion or westernized. Marriage to British or even German or anyplace is the world would not be the concern here, I think the concern is simply about her choice of not being in a marriage. Had this daughter respected her mother, or had any respect for herself ... she would not be with a man who is in a relationship of sleeping with her ... its a very disturbing form of relationship in my view. Its something which increasing number of Poles are getting afflicted, I do accept... but still there are families which do not have it among them ... these are families with values and legacy ...
JonnyMThreads: 16
Posts: 4,487
Joined: Mar 9, 11 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:36    #20
Lodz_The_Boat:
I think her momma is a person of values and pure sentiments.

More probably a sharp-tongued old bat.
NomadatNetThreads: 6
Posts: 1,492
Joined: Mar 28, 09 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:37    #21
JonnyM:
Given gender inequality and the glass ceiling, women are more likely to be poorer. Still doesn't makethem prostitutes.


JonnyM:
Somebody is a prostitute if they earn money by having sexual relations for cash.


Some females have sexual relations by cash money directly and some others have that indirectly. Calling only those getting cash money as prostitute is unfair to them. Mistresses are usually paid indirectly. So-called temporary darlings too with money involved in relation too are prostitutes.
Lodz_The_BoatThreads: 58
Posts: 2,314
Joined: Sep 7, 08 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:38    #22
JonnyM:
More probably a sharp-tongued old bat.

No ... I think I can understand her much better than you do. I would be surprised if Magdalena doesn't.

But then, it depends of the family and the brought-up. It is to be remembered that not every Pole has been given the same values ... we differ with families and personal choices as well.
stinkybuggerThreads: -
Posts: 84
Joined: Apr 14, 11 ♀ 		 May 31, 11, 16:40    #23
Lodz_The_Boat:
or had any respect for herself ... she would not be with a man who is in a relationship of sleeping with her ... its a very disturbing form of relationship in my view.


So do you think people have no respect for themselves if they sleep with someone before marriage? If so does this apply to men and women or just women?
MagdalenaThreads: 5
Posts: 1,389
Joined: Aug 15, 07 ♀ 		 May 31, 11, 16:42    #24
Lodz_The_Boat:
its a very disturbing form of relationship in my view


And has been practiced since the dawn of mankind. Marriage is a much younger institution. Additionally, the daughter might wish to marry the guy later. It might be her choice, not his, to not marry him at present. So much for
Lodz_The_Boat:
a man who would not shy away from taking the honor of this responsibility with confidence.


Or do you think every young couple who'd maybe slept together a couple of times should immediately rush down to the register office and get married?
WroclawThreads: 77
Posts: 7,404
Joined: Apr 1, 06  Pictures: 3 ♂ [Moderator] 		 May 31, 11, 16:42    #25
Lodz_The_Boat:
she would not be with a man who is in a relationship of sleeping with her ..


you make it seem like all Polish folk lose their virginity in the marital bed.
MagdalenaThreads: 5
Posts: 1,389
Joined: Aug 15, 07 ♀ 		 May 31, 11, 16:43    #26
NomadatNet:
So-called temporary darlings


Where do you get this wacky terminology?
NomadatNetThreads: 6
Posts: 1,492
Joined: Mar 28, 09 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:46    #27
Magdalena:
And has been practiced since the dawn of mankind. Marriage is a much younger institution


Marriage is an institution as old as humans. It became monetary marriage after the money is introduced. This monetary character of marriage can be seen even in gay marriages.
HarryThreads: 62
Posts: 8,508
Joined: May 2, 07 ♂ [Suspended] 		 May 31, 11, 16:46    #28
Wroclaw:
all Polish folk lose their virginity in the marital bed.

They do (it just isn't usually their own marital bed).
JonnyMThreads: 16
Posts: 4,487
Joined: Mar 9, 11 ♂ 		 May 31, 11, 16:47    #29
Lodz_The_Boat:
No ... I think I can understand her much better than you do.

I doubt that. She just wants a wesele to fuss about. That and the fact that anyone who'd call her own daughter a prostitute just because she has a boyfriend is probably a nasty piece of work anyway.
stinkybuggerThreads: -
Posts: 84
Joined: Apr 14, 11 ♀ 		 May 31, 11, 16:48    #30
JonnyM:
the fact that anyone who'd call her own daughter a prostitute just because she has a boyfriend is probably a nasty piece of work anyway.


Exactly

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