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How should I approach this young Polish man that I like?


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SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 8, 10, 11:30    #1
About six weeks ago, I met a young Polish man at work (well, he works there, I just volunteer), and we've become good friends.

I really like him, and he sort of seems like he likes me, and so I'm wondering -- would it seem forward of me to ask him out? I don't want him to think I'm pushy.

Also -- I'm NOT trying to generalise, I would just like to know how that would seem to a Pole. Most English men I've known would be happy for a girl to take her clothes off before she tells them her name, but in my experience, continental Europeans tend to have a bit more class. I just really don't want to scare this guy away.

Basically, if he hasn't made a move in six weeks, is it likely that he's not interested in me that way and should I just let it go? OR could he be waiting for a bit more encouragement from me?

Thanks.
southernThreads: 116
Posts: 10,959
Joined: May 17, 07 ♂ 		 Oct 8, 10, 11:33    #2
Spaniel:
Also -- I'm NOT trying to generalise, I would just like to know how that would seem to a Pole. Most English men I've known would be happy for a girl to take her clothes off before she tells them her name, but in my experience, continental Europeans tend to have a bit more class. away.


Yes,we usually ask for her age as well.
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 8, 10, 11:39    #3
southern:
Yes,we usually ask for her age as well.


Yes, and what a difference that makes!
businessmaninplThreads: 10
Posts: 30
Joined: Aug 17, 10 ♂ 		 Oct 8, 10, 12:01    #4
Spaniel:
would it seem forward of me to ask him out?


I was once asked out on a date by a woman. Nothing wrong with that. He might be shy, so make your move because there is no sense in waiting!


good luck:)
zetigrekThreads: 59
Posts: 2,709
Joined: May 20, 10 ♂ 		Edited by: zetigrek  Oct 8, 10, 12:13    #5
Spaniel:
I really like him, and he sort of seems like he likes me, and so I'm wondering -- would it seem forward of me to ask him out? I don't want him to think I'm pushy.


Try to smile to him a lot. Be nice and helpful. He will feel that you are intrested in him and that should be a trigger for him to ask you out or start a talk at least.

businessmaninpl:

I was once asked out on a date by a woman. Nothing wrong with that. He might be shy, so make your move because there is no sense in waiting!


Yeah that's also ok.
jablkoThreads: -
Posts: 156
Joined: Jul 13, 10 ♂ 		 Oct 8, 10, 14:08    #6
Many guys like it when girls asks them out.
...  Oct 8, 10, 14:14    #7
How should I approach this young Polish man that I like?

In your birthday suite, of course.
David_18Threads: 111
Posts: 1,212
Joined: Jan 4, 07 ♂ 		 Oct 8, 10, 14:22    #8
Buy him a ticket back home to Poland and see how he responds!

;)
SeanusThreads: 22
Posts: 30,158
Joined: Dec 25, 07 ♂ 		 Oct 8, 10, 14:24    #9
Say you are an egg handler. That'll make him laugh :)
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 19, 10, 02:01    #10
Thank you so much everyone for all your help; I took zetigrek's advice and smiled a lot & acted interested in him, etc. (as I wanted to try this first before I got onto actually asking him out), and it worked! He asked me out and we had our first date last Saturday...so thanks so much!! :)
wildroverThreads: 180
Posts: 8,188
Joined: Jun 7, 07 ♂ 		 Oct 19, 10, 02:28    #11
His wife is gonna be real mad...!
guesswhoThreads: 23
Posts: 3,326
Joined: Mar 17, 10 ♀ 		Edited by: guesswho  Oct 19, 10, 02:31    #12
Spaniel:
How should I approach this young Polish man that I like?


How did you approach all of the other guys before?
Filios1Threads: 15
Posts: 1,953
Joined: Nov 13, 07 ♂ 		 Oct 19, 10, 02:35    #13
Spaniel:
How should I approach this young Polish man that I like?


Use a high grade kielbasa, rub it all over your clothes and skin to get the smell. In this fashion, approach the young Polish man that you like.

Spaniel:
could he be waiting for a bit more encouragement from me?


He's waiting for you to use the one and only Polish aphrodisiac.
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 19, 10, 02:59    #14
guesswho:
How did you approach all of the other guys before?


I didn't need to; they approached me. But it quickly became apparent that I had to change my game if I wished to ensnare a lovely Slav...

Filios1 -- thanks. I'll remember that trick for next time.
trener zolwiaThreads: 5
Posts: 2,786
Joined: Jun 8, 10 ♂ 		 Oct 19, 10, 04:34    #15
jablko:
Many guys like it when girls asks them out.

I somewhat disagree with this.

Spaniel:
I took zetigrek's advice and smiled a lot & acted interested in him, etc. (as I wanted to try this first before I got onto actually asking him out), and it worked! He asked me out and we had our first date last Saturday

Good for you. So how'd the date go?
hague1cmaeronThreads: 21
Posts: 1,654
Joined: Mar 30, 10 ♂ 		 Oct 19, 10, 06:07    #16
Spaniel:
would it seem forward of me to ask him out? I don't want him to think I'm pushy.


No it would not, why do women think it's somehow always the man's responsibility to ask a women out? You have just as much right and responsibility as the man does. So take the initiative, some fellas are shy you know, and they perceive having to ask a woman as old fashioned.
DarrenMThreads: 2
Posts: 126
Joined: Dec 21, 07 ♂ 		 Oct 19, 10, 15:18    #17
Spaniel:
Also -- I'm NOT trying to generalise, I would just like to know how that would seem to a Pole. Most English men I've known would be happy for a girl to take her clothes off before she tells them her name


Lets be absolutely clear.....You did generalise

Perhaps I could reciprocate.......

The reason I have a Polish wife is because Polish women aside the fact their exterior is far more pleasing to the eye than cheap, tarty, overweight British girls, don't open thier legs after a couple of Alchopops and don't have an army of bed partners. Moreover, British men wouldn't be so sexually active if the British women didn't reciprocate or even instigate for that matter. It takes 2 to tango.

Not so nice is it...............

This isn't some behavioural trait exclusive to English/British men. If you think European men are much different to British men then your are deluded and you should take a trip off that planet your living on from time to time and see some more of planet earth.

Whilst you are busy giving it the, "All British men are this and that" and the poor suffering British female is simply waiting quietly, longing for her European knight in shining armour to rescue her from a life of tyranny at the hands of neanderthol Brit, you should stick your head out of the clouds sometime and take a look down many high streets in the UK and you will see the female populous every bit as boisterous/obnoxious as the male populous.

And I for one am delighted I don't have to suffer the British female.
VarsovianThreads: 91
Posts: 568
Joined: Nov 23, 06 ♂ 		 Oct 19, 10, 15:27    #18
It's bad in Britain but worse in Doncaster!
warszawskiThreads: 60
Posts: 2,389
Joined: May 21, 10 ♂ 		Edited by: warszawski  Oct 19, 10, 15:30    #19
Spaniel:
I wished to ensnare a lovely Slav...


Would the ... be in the place of the e ?
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 20, 10, 03:57    #20
trener zolwia:
Good for you. So how'd the date go?

All things considered, I would say...my best date ever. We completely connected, and even though we made plans to see go out again on Friday, the next day he sent me two texts...one in the morning to ask me how I was, and one in the evening to tell me he'd been thinking about me all day!! I mean, how romantic is that?!
I'm seeing him again at work tomorrow and CANNOT wait...

DarrenM:
you will see the female populous every bit as boisterous/obnoxious as the male populous.

Darren -- you misunderstood me; it's not English men I have a problem with, it's English people. I assure you, if I ever need to put the moves on a Polish chick, you'll find my post to be just as cruel about English women...
But seriously, I was only fooling and meant nothing by it. Sorry if I offended you.
As for reciprocal generalising not being nice...I actually don't really care -- because I'm not like those English girls you describe, so I don't care what you say about that type of person. I think they're scummy too. I'm more than happy to admit the problems in my own society and gender.

warszawski:
Would the ... be in the place of the e ?

LOL...no, of course not! I believe in total equality...plus, he certainly doesn't seem the type that would want to be some woman's slave. Which suits me down to the ground. ;)
trener zolwiaThreads: 5
Posts: 2,786
Joined: Jun 8, 10 ♂ 		 Oct 20, 10, 04:02    #21
Spaniel:
my best date ever. We completely connected

Wow, that's quite a testament. Well played.
Good luck with it. :)
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 20, 10, 04:06    #22
trener zolwia:
Good luck with it. :)

Thank you so much. :)
PennBoyThreads: 157
Posts: 3,443
Joined: Dec 7, 08  Pictures: 2 ♂ 		 Oct 20, 10, 04:31    #23
Spaniel:
Basically, if he hasn't made a move in six weeks, is it likely that he's not interested in me that way and should I just let it go?

He might be just a little shy many Polish men are, or is a bit intimidated, he's probably just not sure how to approach an English girl, he don't know what your reaction might be. Just go up to him tell him you don't normally do this, but you like him and would like to hang out with him some time.
trener zolwiaThreads: 5
Posts: 2,786
Joined: Jun 8, 10 ♂ 		 Oct 20, 10, 05:09    #24
PennBoy:
he don't know what your reaction might be.

He knows!
xylaThreads: -
Posts: 6
Joined: Oct 19, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 20, 10, 06:44    #25
ask him for a dinner and have time talking with HIm,and ask him what

are the qualities does he like to a girl!! If you are qualified ,maybe you could stay

more closer to him til he discover your attitude.Someday,somehow he will say

He likes u!!....
rlo2476Threads: 1
Posts: 4
Joined: Oct 30, 10 ♀ 		 Oct 30, 10, 14:26    #26
Spaniel,
I'm in the same boat. I met a really nice but older Pole who has been in the US only a few months. He is military so I know he will be leaving and that is ok because he will be here a few years and a lot can happen but...I only want to be friends and maybe have coffee, go hang out sometime or do something. I don't want him to think I'm pushy either. We did go out once already, he smiles at me all the time when we talk but I am still not sure what he thinks. Honestly, I do like him. He seems like such a great guy, very reserved and calm. I think he may be shy as well. Still, I think friendship is a good start. So, my question is...are older Polish men harder to get to know?
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		 Nov 7, 10, 02:05    #27
rlo2476:
So, my question is...are older Polish men harder to get to know?

rlo, I'm afraid I can't help you, as my Polish man is a younger Polish man...you might be better off starting your own thread... ;)
But what I can tell you is, patience is definitely a virtue (certainly, it was in my case). Just be persistent but patient. And all the advice I got in this thread was very helpful -- my approach was to smile at him a lot and act interested (as someone on here suggested), because, to be completely honest, if I'd had to actually ask him out, I probably would have thrown up on his shoes from nervousness, so I was really saving that as a last resort. BUT, I was told on here that asking him out wouldn't seem pushy, so maybe you could consider trying that?
Whatever you decide, good luck!
trener zolwiaThreads: 5
Posts: 2,786
Joined: Jun 8, 10 ♂ 		 Nov 7, 10, 03:17    #28
Spaniel:
I was told on here that asking him out wouldn't seem pushy

It's not about a girl being pushy, per se. Guys want to feel like they are doing the pursuing and can get turned off if a girl come across as too eager. I know I do. She can flirt and make herself available and even give him little nudges, but as for asking the guy out, nah. The closest I ever want a girl to do is maybe playfully say 'are you ever going to ask me out?' That should do the trick, even with a shy guy.

Spaniel:
my Polish man

So how are things between you and your Polish boy? Are you two a regular item now?
SpanielThreads: 2
Posts: 16
Joined: Oct 7, 10 ♀ 		Edited by: Spaniel  Nov 7, 10, 03:31    #29
trener zolwia:
how are things between you and your Polish boy?

Incredible. :)
Seriously, I have never felt like this. He's the most amazing person I've ever known. I couldn't be happier (and according to him, neither could he!). And the accent...

As for asking a guy out, certainly, it's not something I would ever want to do; and to be honest, if I was a guy, I'd feel the same as you -- I would find it a bit of a turn-off if a girl was that forward with me.
trener zolwiaThreads: 5
Posts: 2,786
Joined: Jun 8, 10 ♂ 		 Nov 7, 10, 03:38    #30
Spaniel:
I have never felt like this.

Spaniel:
I couldn't be happier

Good for you. Ride it for all it's worth. :)

Spaniel:
And the accent...

Oh, I know aaaall about it! :]

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