Do you think letters after you have broken up work ??

I'm not great at writing letters but after breaking up with my kochanie(her choice) nearly a week ago now i was thinking of maybe putting things into words .... from your experience do you think this is a good thing to do or just a waste of time ??

It depends on what you want to achieve from it?

be a man and grow some. Don't be the animal in Daisys' pic minus the "-cat" part.

be busy. too busy for her. never have time for her. it will drive her crazy. she will/might realize her mistake and come grovelling back.

then again, she might be with another guy now. Mr. Rebound. or Mr Nextinline

if not.... the next bus is in 15 minutes.

lol .... i guess i would just like to think well at least i tried & gave it my best shot but yea i'm probably just clutching at straws.

it's a girl cat!! with all it's bits

i think we all know what i was implying. :P and it wasn't "kitty"

ultimately to have another chance & give time ,i think she was scared because we were both going at different speeds,the first i find out is when she tells me this & that we should finish ,without having the opportunity of maybe slowing down & seeing where it goes from there .

then I would say teh answer is No...

If you just wanted to get things off your chest and ssay how you felt, then it might help

write the letter by all means... the process itself will probably be helpful... but wait awhile before you send it if you send it at all

I was expecting a different answer from you...

don't forget about "sender regret"

Write a 'no send' letter, then put it away somewhere, look at it in 6 months time and you'll be amazed how far you've moved on in that time

obviously he should be writing the letter after he has shagged her best friend... duh...

that's what I was expecting

goes without saying... surely...

My advice would be "dont do it" if someone I finished with sent me a letter I would probably just tear it up and get annoyed, she made her choice now you should respect it.

If anything, I advise you to write a "regular" HAND-WRITTEN letter - on paper. Not email for sure.

I must concur with the others.....don't send her a letter.....move on with your life.....good luck! :)

Dont do it! I made that mistake and she still has it, god knows why but what ever. She kept all the items I gave her while we where together. I've told her to get rid of them but she won't she says it reminds her of the good happy times we had! (f u c k that! get rid of it!)
Only send a letter as last resort, and put in it something like do one you *****!
I know it might be a bit strong but as the guy says **** happens
Scott someone else comes a long it may take a couple of weeks or so but they do come!
If you build it she it will come!
Hold on in there, dont listen to songs that remind you of her or about her!

oh crap.. send the letter. if anything just to get your feelings down on paper. it
doesnt make you less a man when you share your feelings.

but I would move on too. just tell her how much love you had ( past tense) felt
but that you will move on.. dont write that you hate her, or anything bad, makes
you look like a stalker jerk who wont leave her alone.. silence is golden in alot of
things.. she made this choice, so just tell her, maybe later on we can be friends.

life is too short to sit and pout, so go out with your friends and have a good time.
but dont compare these ladies to your last one.. each person you will date is
unique in their own ways. sp make sure you match with them.. dont see more
outside then inside.. I know you can figure that one out..

she probably wont respond to your note, but that dont matter, you said what you
wanted to say. if anything, consider yourself lucky to feel that kind of love and that
its possible to feel this way again. and it will happen with time.. chin up :)

hang in there and lots of good wishes to find your soul mate :)

Lt Navy.. as a man you might not see the signifiance to keeping such items but we
women do. even if things dont work out between two people, you still always have
a place in your heart for them, aside from the differences/troubles you had in the
relationship.. its better ( here I go again) to say I have loved then to not have loved
at all.

all the penned up anger you have to you might not be nothing and not causing harm
yet. but it will in the long run.. later on you will compare things your old love did with
the new one.. if you dont think it can happen it does. because you never let go of the
anger from the old one. so you will think things are going bad, when they arent, and
this new person will wonder what the heck is wrong with you..

you need to have fun, but with a female who is just a friend and nothing else so
you can gain back some trust and see things from the other side of the fence.

your only seeing your side, if someone keeps things I gave to them, I was the one
who gave this, it meant something obviously if they want to keep it.. so that is a
very heartfelt thing to do.. how can you tell someone to throw away memories they
cherish.. that is really selfish. sorry but i call it as I read it.. refrain from giving advice
that is penned up anger... not everyone will experience the same ..

the old saying different strokes for different folks.

Patrycja19 that was a most intelligent heart felt reply, Although you a litte off!
There’s just no penned up anything, it’s empty! So there is no anger or pain “nothing”
You just don’t think of them
I know she won’t throw them away, I was mirroring her (don’t gave a flying F* ck ) emotion
“If you love someone set they free! If they return to you they’re yours for ever!” or
“Its is better to have loved and losted than not to have loved at all” .
The second time didn’t go like it was suppose too!
It just wasn’t meant to be!


The saying goes! Say La Vie! That’s the way it goes.

yes, there is something penned up, your just not facing it.. I think you will be fine.

;)

Hello Scott,

You know what they say... "Say it with perfume, say it with mink, but NEVER EVER say it with ink."

never heard of that expression before ! ... i'm sure if i bought her perfume she would accept but still not have me back :(

I think i'll leave the letter thing for just now & just try & get on with my life for now as best i can .

I agree, by writing the letter you will release some of your feelings. I would not send it though...try to move on... if she sees you enjoying your self she may realise what she is missing?

Hee, hee. I've still got one I wrote 27 years ago...... Made me feel better writing it but God it's sickly as hell

Get that tail from between your legs. Man up and go find another that'll appreciate you. You'll be aiight mate.

well, writing a letter to express your feelings is a good thing, as long as you don't mail it.

As for moving on -I think it is a great idea, however it will take sometime. DOn't try to rush out of it. Feel the pain and don't run away from it by e.g drinking or going on a rebound ( I am not saying that you that kind of person )
If you are feeling hurt - just stay with it instead of getting distructed. Otherwise it will take longer to heal. i know I sound like a new age guru, but it is really old stuff. Process your feelings as long as you need to.

But isn't it better to start seeing someone else to rip out or kill any kind of feelings or what ever remains for the last person you where with?
And with more people you put in between yourself and them you will forget them quicker?